Charlie’s Raven (Excerpt VII)《查理的渡鸦》（节选七）

琼·克雷格黑德·乔治/文　吴文安/译析

Every dawn for the next week Blue Sky would announce the sunrise by “gro， gro-ing” for food. Charlie would slide out of bed， dress， and take the young raven to breakfast on his shoulder. The two would enter Granddad’s house for what had become an elaborate morning ritual—Blue Sky and Granddad exchanging greetings.

随后一周的每天清晨，蓝天都会在日出时分“咕噜，咕噜噜”高声叫着要吃的。查理都会溜下床，穿上衣服，把小渡鸦放在肩头带他去吃早餐。他们一人一鸟进入爷爷的大屋，来一遍已经习以为常的繁复晨礼——蓝天和爷爷互致问候。

On one of these sunrises Singing Bird knocked on Charlie’s door to go fishing. Knowing that the breakfast visit with Granddad would hold up the expedition， Charlie fed Blue Sky in his cabin， put him on his shoulder， and took him along.

有一天日出时分，歌唱鸟敲响了查理的门，邀请他去钓鱼。查理知道，如果去爷爷那里吃早饭就会耽误行程，于是在自己的小木屋里喂了蓝天，然后把他放在肩头，带他一起去钓鱼。

They didn’t get very far. Blue Sky sulked， put his head low， and drooped his wings. When they had gotten as far as the nest box of the smallest American Falcon—the kestrel—attached to Granddad’s telephone pole， Singing Bird became alarmed.

他們走了没多远，蓝天就闷闷不乐，垂着头，耷拉着翅膀。等他们走到美国最小的隼类——红隼——的巢箱那里，歌唱鸟警觉起来。那个巢箱挂在爷爷的电话线杆子上。

“Do you think he’s sick？” she asked.

“你觉得蓝天是不是病了？”歌唱鸟问。

“I think he’s mad，” Charlie said. “I didn’t let him go through the greeting ritual of bumping heads with Granddad.”

“我认为他生气了。”查理说。“刚才，我没有让他跟爷爷进行互致问候的碰头晨礼。”

“Could that be？” Singing Bird asked. “Are you saying ravens are like my dad？ They have to do everything according to ritual？”

“有这种可能吗？”歌唱鸟问道。“你是说渡鸦跟我爸爸很像？他们的一切行为都要按照既定程序去做？”

“Looks like it，” Charlie said. “Let’s go home and find out. We can fish later.”

“看来是这样的。”查理说。“让我们回家验证一下。之后再去钓鱼。”

They turned around and went back to the ranch house. As Charlie stepped inside， Blue Sky jumped from his shoulder to the floor and fluttered to the trash basket. He knocked it over with a wing smack. He scattered the papers across the living room floor， shredded an envel-ope， and tore up a piece of mail before Charlie could stop him. When he finally caught him in both hands， Blue Sky yelled and squawked all the way to the cabin. Charlie closed the door so Blue Sky couldn’t leave and returned to help Singing Bird clean up the mess before Grandma Sally came in from weeding her little “hope” garden. “Hope” that the lettuce would not be killed by a summer frost before they could eat it.

他们转身回到农场大屋。查理一踏进屋里，蓝天就从他肩膀跳到地上，扑扇着翅膀冲向垃圾筐。蓝天用翅膀一下子打翻了筐子，弄得客厅里满地都是废纸，又撕碎了一个信封，弄烂了一封信，查理这才拦住了他。查理好不容易用双手把蓝天抓住，送到小木屋去，一路上蓝天还在高声尖叫。查理关上小木屋的门，不让蓝天跑出来，然后回屋去帮着歌唱鸟收拾烂摊子。奶奶莎莉回来前必须收拾好。奶奶正在她小小的“希望”花园里除草呢。奶奶除草，是“希望”在夏天的霜冻破坏之前大家能吃上莴苣。

Granddad， who had watched Blue Sky’s destructive performance， was grinning and sitting up straight in his chair. His lean face looked younger.

爷爷呢，一直在旁边看着蓝天搞破坏，咧着嘴笑，端端正正地在椅子上坐着。他瘦削的脸看上去年轻了些。

“He’s mad at you， Charlie，” he said.

“他生你的气了，查理。”爷爷说。

“Why？ I’m his mother！”

“为什么？我是他妈妈！”

“You changed his routine.”

“你改变了他的日常习惯。”

The next morning Blue Sky awoke Charlie with his soft love sounds， and Charlie， acting as if nothing had gone wrong yesterday， took him to breakfast at Granddad’s. He was going to restore Blue Sky’s routine. If Blue Sky was good， Charlie would know that changing his routine turned him into a bad bird. Then he pondered. “But he let me know about it and that’s good.” He rubbed his chin in confusion.

第二天早上，藍天又用他充满爱意的声音把查理叫醒，然后查理装作昨天一切如常，又带他去爷爷那里吃早餐。查理要恢复蓝天的日常习惯。如果蓝天很乖，查理就会知道，改变日常习惯会让蓝天变成一只坏鸟。然后查理又想，“但是他让我知道这一点，还是好事。”查理不知所措地揉了揉下巴。

【背景知识】这一选段介绍了渡鸦的一种习性，即恪守日常习惯。选段描述了小渡鸦因为日常习惯被打乱，先是闹脾气，后来乱扔垃圾，撕毁信件，高声尖叫等有趣的行为。传播生态知识是生态文学的功能之一。这里作者用生动有趣的场景活灵活现地把知识具象化了。

【第一段】这里有象声词“gro， gro-ing”，第二个词语不容易再现，译者使用了叠字法“咕噜，咕噜噜”，希望能有所体现。the two很简洁，译文补充为“他们一人一鸟”。如果直译为“他们俩”不太清楚，而“两个人”“两只鸟”更为不妥。

【第二段】蓝天和爷爷每天早上吃饭前的见面晨礼比较复杂，包括用声音问候，互相碰头等等，需要耗费不少时间。因此，查理在小木屋里直接喂了蓝天，想节省时间，赶紧去钓鱼。

【第三段】这一段中的第三句里有一个插入成分“attached to Granddad’s telephone pole”。插入语是翻译当中经常要考虑的难点之一，这是一个英汉语的句法对比问题。因为在英文句子里，语法逻辑很重要，借助语法逻辑，插入语在英文句子中并不显得突兀，也不会造成明显的不连贯。然而中文句子一般不用插入成分，否则会显得不够连贯。所以译文把插入成分提取出来，放到后面。一般把这种翻译方法称为“外位法”。

【第四段】这一段中的几个地方，译文都进行了具体化处理。比如greeting ritual（互致问候的晨礼）、according to ritual（按照既定程序）、find out（验证一下），目的是让译文更加明确易懂。

【第五段】这一段的重点是连续动作。译文当力求再现原文生动的动作描写，不要打断语流。最后一句，译文添加了“奶奶除草”，以便更好地连接上下文，使之更连贯。

【第六段】这里的短语sitting up straight隐含义是爷爷心如明镜，早就洞悉了小渡鸦大闹客厅的缘由，没有着急，也没有慌张，所以只是“端端正正地坐在椅子上”，看着小渡鸦“作闹”和表演。看来还是爷爷知识渊博，懂得鸟儿习性。

【第七段】分句acting as if nothing had gone wrong yesterday直译将会是“装作昨天没有什么做错了似的”，比较拗口和费解，所以译文反向翻译为“查理装作昨天一切如常”。年轻的查理对渡鸦习性还不太了解，心里在掂量小渡鸦到底是不是“坏鸟”，然后又因喜爱小渡鸦，为他辩护，这才困惑地揉着下巴。这里的心理描写惟妙惟肖。

【小结】该选段的原文特色是描述生动有趣，翻译难度不是很大。然而，其中也有一个需要调换句子顺序的地方，涉及到英汉句法对比等基础知识。选段中连续的动作描写也要注意，译文不应该破坏其连贯性。再者，选段中有好几个地方都使用了增译扩充法，以便让译文更明晰具体。