巧用英语写作模板 书面表达亮点频现

河南 （特级教师）

（作者单位：河南省郑州市第十六中学）

众所周知，优秀考生英语Ⅰ卷的得分往往相差无几，真正拉开考生分数差距的是Ⅱ卷。由于考生在英语书面表达部分得分悬殊较大，从某种意义上来说，书面表达分数的高低决定高考的成败。笔者发现，由于很多考生平时的语言积累不够，驾驭句子的能力较差，缺乏英语写作的技巧和策略，因此写出的书面表达错误百出，严重影响了写作档次。如果巧用英语写作模板，考生就能把握不同英语文体的篇章结构，借助烂熟于心的常见英语句式，使语言表达更为流畅，不仅避免了低级的语法错误，而且为短文增加多处亮点。本文拟分析考生在英语书面表达写作中存在的问题，探讨英语写作模板的使用,以帮助考生提高书面表达的得分。

一、自荐信（申请信）

假定你是李华，你市将在7月举办一场国际图书博览会，现在正在招募志愿者。你打算成为一名志愿者，请用英文给组委会写一封自荐信。内容包括：

1.写信意图；

2.个人优势；

3.希望回复。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Sir/Madam,

Yours,

Li Hua

【考生习作】

Dear Sir/Madam,

Knowing that our city will hold the International Book Fair in July, I am writing to apply to be a volunteer.It can’t be better if you can agree with it①.

I am a student from Xinhua Middle School at present.My favorite hobby is reading books.I am friendly and easygoing.So I can get along well with other people.I always help others, so I can help you do some work②.I believe I can do it really well.

I would appreciate it if you can agree with it③.I am waiting for your reply④.

Yours,

Li Hua

存在问题：

考生能根据写作提纲进行写作，内容包括写信意图、申请原因和个人优势。但是，通览全文，我们发现习作中存在一些问题：

1.书信的结构不合理。考生应首先做自我介绍，让收信人知道自己是谁，为什么写这封信，然后再陈述自己具备的优势，并表达期待收到回复的愿望。作者在第一段的第一句表明写作目的，第二段才进行自我介绍，写作顺序不符合逻辑，由于缺少写作背景的铺垫，显得非常突兀。

2.没有使用过渡语和主题句，行文的逻辑性和条理性较差。

3.语言表达不地道，句①、句②和句④带有明显的汉语表达的痕迹。

4.句③有语法错误，本句应用虚拟语气，应把can改为could。此外，这句话属于汉语式的表达。书信的结尾句应为：I would appreciate it if you could give me an early reply。

【高分范文】

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am Li Hua, a 17-year-old boy from Xinhua Middle School.I learn from the newspaper that some volunteers are needed for the International Book Fair to be held in our city in July.I am writing to recommend myself.

My advantages are as follows: First, I am friendly and helpful, which makes it easy for me to get along with others.Second, I am so good at spoken English that I can communicate with native speakers without diffi culty.I think I am qualifi ed to be a volunteer.Please give me a chance.

I would be grateful if you could give me an early reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：自我介绍、写信的背景（消息来源）和写作目的

第二段：陈述自己具备的优势

(1)性格特点；

(2)语言能力；

(3)组织（交际）能力。

第三段：希望申请被批准，期待收到回复

【写作模板】

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am Li Hua, a student from...I know from...that some...are needed...I am writing to recommend myself/apply for the opportunity to work as a（an） ...

My advantages are as follows: First, I am..., which makes it easy for me to ...Second, I am so good at...that I can ...I think I am qualifi ed to be ...Please give me a chance.

I would be grateful if you could give me an early reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假如你叫李华，你市博物馆正在招募兼职解说员（interpreter），在周末为外国游客进行英语解说。请根据下面的写作提示，用英语写一封自荐信。内容包括：

1.写信意图；

2.个人优势；

3.希望获准。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Sir/Madam,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am Li Hua, a student fromNo.1 Middle School.Iknow fromthe Internetthat somepart-time interpretersare neededat weekends.I am writing to recommend myself.

My advantages are as follows: First, I amfriendly and helpful,which makes it easy for me toget along with others.Second, I am so good atspoken Englishthat I cancommunicate with native speakers without diffi culty.I think I am qualified to bean interpreter.Please give me a chance.

I would be grateful if you could give me an early reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

二、感谢信

假如你是李华，最近你参加了学校举办的英语演讲比赛，并荣获一等奖。请给外教Miss Perkins发一封英语邮件，感谢她的帮助。内容包括：

1.分享获奖的消息；

2.感谢她的帮助。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Miss Perkins,

Yours，

Li Hua

【考生习作】

Dear Miss Perkins,

How are you? It’s been a long time without meeting you①.Here are some good news for you②.I have won the English Speech Contest last month③.

Don’t you remember the days when you taught us English? My English was so bad that I lost confi dence about myself④.I never thought I would take part in the English Speech Contest.Thank you very much.Through your hard work, my English got better and better⑤.Without you, I can’t learn my English well⑥.

Now I have full confidence about my future life.I am working hard towards my dream.

Best wishes.

Yours，

Li Hua

存在问题：

1.由于写作目的不明确，短文的内容杂乱无章，考生没有围绕感谢信这个主题组织材料。

2.文中出现多个汉语式的句子，显得语言表达不地道，如句①、句③、句④和句⑤。

3.句②和句⑥中有语法错误。句②中的are应改为is；句⑥陈述的情况与现在事实相反，应用虚拟语气。本句可改为：I couldn’t have improved my English without your help.

【高分范文】

Dear Miss Perkins,

Here is some good news for you.I got the first place in the English Speech Contest held in our school last week.I am writing to express my sincere gratitude to you for kind help.

When I signed up for the contest, I was nervous because I had never participated in such an activity.When I turned to you for help, you encouraged me to try my best.You were patient with me when I practiced in front of you.Not only did you correct my pronunciation and intonation, you also taught me speaking skills.Without your kind help, I couldn’t have achieved success.

Thank you again for your kind help.

Yours，

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：写信背景和写作目的

第二段：感谢对方的原因

(1)自己遇到的困难；

(2)对方为自己做了什么；

(3)对方的帮助如何使自己受益。

第三段：再次向对方表示感谢

【写作模板】

Dear Miss.../Mr....

Here is some good news for you.I won/got/was...in ...last...I am writing to express my sincere gratitude to you for kind help.

When I ..., I was...because I...When I turned to you for help, you encouraged me to...You were patient with me when I ...Not only did you ..., you also...Without your kind help, I couldn’t have...

Thank you again for your kind help.

Yours，

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假定你是李华，是某国际学校的高中生。在高中毕业前夕，你收到国外大学的录取通知书。请根据以下的写作提纲给外教Susan写一封英语感谢信。内容包括：

1.分享你的好消息；

2.感谢老师为你提供的帮助；

3.表示祝愿。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Susan,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Susan,

Here is some good news for you.I was admitted into a foreign university last month.I am writing to express my sincere gratitude to you for kind help.

When Iapplied for the foreign university,I wasnot confident about myselfbecause Ididn’t know how to write a letter of recommendation.When I turned to you for help, you encouraged meto list my advantages in English.You were patient with me when Iasked you to check my resume.Not only did youoffer me some valuable advice,you alsopolished my writing.Without your kind help, I couldn’t havebeen admitted.

Thank you again for your kind help.I wish you all the best.

Yours，

Li Hua

三、建议信

假定你是李华。你的外国笔友Lily因为长期节食减肥而生病住院。请根据下面的写作提示，用英语给她写一封邮件。内容包括：

1.写作目的；

2.提出建议；

3.希望情况好转。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

【考生习作】

Dear Lily,

I feel very sad to know you are in hospital these days because you have disease①.The purpose of writing this letter is to offer you some advices②.

I think you are wrong to be on a diet because it will make you unhealthy③.You’d better stop being on a diet right now.You should eat healthy food to keep fit.I advise you to eat some meat, vegetables and fruits because they contain various nutrients you need.Drinking some milk is also good for your healthy④.

If you follow the above advice, I am sure you will get better soon.

Yours，

Li Hua

存在问题：

1.由于第二段没有使用信号词把几条建议连接起来，因此显得比较散乱，层次性较差。

2.虽然句①和句③中没有明显的语法错误，但句子带有汉语表达的痕迹，属于低级表达。

3.句②和句④中有明显的语法错误。句②中应把advices改为advice。句④中的healthy应改为health。

【高分范文】

Dear Lily,

I am sorry to know you are ill in hospital because you have been on a diet for a long time.I’m writing to offer you some advice.

First of all, it is important for you to have a balanced diet including grain, meat, vegetables and fruits, which can provide enough energy for your body.You are likely to feel tired and even get sick if you are always on a diet.Second, you should have three meals on time because skipping breakfast is harmful.More importantly, it is a good idea to take physical exercise regularly, which will build up your health in the long run.

I hope you will find my advice useful.

Yours，

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：（自我介绍）写信的背景、写信的目的

第二段：提出几点建议

1.……是很重要的；

2.你最好(应该)做……

3.我建议你……

第三段：希望对方情况好转（希望尽快摆脱困境/希望建议有帮助）

【写作模板】

Dear ...,

I am sorry to know that you are...I’m writing to make some suggestions for you/offer you some advice./Here is some advice for you.

First of all/First, it is important for you to (do sth).Second, you should/had better do sth.Besides/More importantly,I advise you to do sth./It is a good idea to do sth.

I hope you will find my advice useful./If you follow my advice, I am sure you will...

Yours，

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假如你叫李华，最近收到外国笔友Jimmy发来的一封邮件，说他汉语听说能力较差，向你发出求助。请根据下面的写作要点，用英语给他回复一封邮件。内容包括：

1.写作目的；

2.提出建议；

3.希望对他有用。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Jimmy,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Jimmy,

I am sorry to know that you arenot good at Chinese listening and speaking.I’m writing to make some suggestions for you.

First of all, it is important for you tobelieve that you can improve your Chinese if you keep on trying.Second, it is a good idea towatch some interesting Chinese movies in your spare time, which can help you to improve your listening ability.More importantly, you shouldmake some Chinese friends and practice speaking with them so that you can improve your speaking.

If you follow my advice, I am sure you willmake progress in your Chinese learning.

Yours，

Li Hua

四、求助信

假定你是李华，暑假想去一家外贸公司兼职，已写好申请书和个人简历(resume)。请给外教Ms.Jenkins 写信，请她帮你修改所附材料的文字和格式（format）。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Ms.Jenkins,

Yours,

Li Hua

【考生习作】

Dear Ms.Jenkins,

How is everything? All the students in my class miss you very much and expect to see you soon①.I really want to do a part-time job in a foreign company.What do you think of my plan?②I have written my application and resume yesterday③.Could you point out my mistakes? I really want to get this job, so please help me correct the unsuitable words and format when you are convenient④.I believe that due to your help,I will be successful and work in a foreign company.I have attached it in the letter⑤.Thank for your help in advance⑥.

Looking forward to your reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

存在问题：

1.分段不合理。短文由两段组成，第一段太长，第二段太短，显得头重脚轻。

2.第一段的内容杂乱无章，条理性较差。第一段应陈述写信的背景和写信目的；第二段陈述发出求助的原因以及希望对方为自己做什么。

3.文中有些句子如句①和句②与短文的主题关系不密切，纯属废话，可删除。

4.文中多个句子带有汉语句式的痕迹，属于低级表达，如句④和句⑥。句③和⑤句有语法错误：句③含有时间状语yesterday，应用一般过去时，也可把yesterday去掉；⑤句中的it应改为 them。

【高分范文】

Dear Ms.Jenkins,

I am Li Hua.How are you doing these days? I’m writing to seek help from you.

The summer vacation is around the corner.It is the longest summer vacation in my life.I have decided to take a part-time job in a foreign company so that I can accumulate some working experience.Besides, I hope to earn some money to support myself at university.I have finished my application and personal resume, but I am not sure about the words and its format.Would you please check them for me when it is convenient for you?

I would appreciate it if you could send them back before Friday.

Yours,

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：自我介绍、写信背景和写信目的

第二段：发出求助的原因以及希望对方为自己做什么

第三段：希望尽快收到答复

【写作模板】

Dear Mr..../Ms....

I am...I am writing to ask you for help./I am writing to seek help from you/ask you for help.

I am planning to do..., but I am not ...That is why I am in need of your help.Would you please tell me how to...when it is convenient for you? /Would you please do sth.before ...？/Would you be so kind as to...?

I’d appreciate it if you could give me a reply at your earliest convenience./I would be grateful if you could give me an early reply.

Yours，

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假如你是李华，你打算参加学校即将举办的英语演讲比赛，但是缺乏经验。请用英语给你校的外教Mr.Smith写一封邮件。内容包括：

1.写信目的；

2.求助的原因和内容；

3.期待收到回复。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Mr.Smith,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Mr.Smith,

I’mLi Hua, a student from Class Six Grade Two.I am writing to ask you for help.

The English Speech Contest is to be held in our school next month.I am planning tosign up for it,but I amnot sure how to prepare a speech in English.That is why I am in need of your help.Would you please tell me howto make my speech more impressivewhen it is convenient for you?Would you be so kind as tocheck my speech when I have finished writing it?

I’d appreciate it if you could give me a reply at your earliest convenience.

Yours，

Li Hua

五、道歉信

假定你是李华，你和交换生Paul原定于本周日上午去市艺术中心观看中国书画展（the Chinese Painting and Calligraphy Exhibition）。你因故无法前往, 请用英语给他发一封电子邮件。内容包括：

1.表示歉意；

2.说明情况；

3.希望谅解。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Paul,

Yours，

Li Hua

【考生习作】

Dear Paul,

I am sorry I can’t attend the Chinese Painting and Calligraphy Exhibition with you on Sunday morning.I hope you can forgive me if you know the situation①.

The reason why I cannot go there with you is that there is an important examination next week.I have to make careful preparation for it②.If I fail the exam, I am afraid that my teacher and my parents will blame me③.I think we can go there when the examination is over.I hope you can understand my condition④.I believe that this will not affect our friendship⑤.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours，

Li Hua

存在问题:

1.写作目的不明确。在道歉信的第一段，写信人应表明写信的目的是向对方道歉：I am writing to express my sincere apology to you。

2.作者在第二段解释不能履约的原因是想在家复习功课，为下周的考试做准备。 一般来说，一个人不能履约是由于意外事件的发生，这样解释让人感觉理由不太充分。

3.句①、句③、句④和句⑤带有明显的汉语表达的痕迹，语言不地道，影响了表达的档次。

4.句②有语法错误，应把preparation改为preparations。

【高分范文】

Dear Paul,

I am sorry for not being able to attend the Chinese Painting and Calligraphy Exhibition with you on Sunday morning.I am writing to express my sincere apology to you.

The reason why I am not available is that I had my ankle sprained while having PE lesson yesterday.The doctor told me to stay at home and have a good rest.I suggest we go to the Chinese Painting and Calligraphy Exhibition next Sunday,when I will probably have recovered.If it is not convenient for you, please tell me what time suits you best.I hope this change will not cause you too much trouble.

Once again I’m sorry for any inconvenience caused.

Yours，

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：写信的背景和写信的目的

第二段：解释为什么要向对方道歉

1.承认自己所犯的错误；

2.给对方造成了什么影响或损失；

3.提出调整方案或如何进行补救。

第三段：希望对方谅解

【写作模板】

Dear ...,

I am sorry for not being able to...I am writing to express my sincere apology to you.

The reason why ...is that ...I suggest...I hope this change will not cause you too much trouble.

Once again I’m sorry for any inconvenience caused.I hope you can forgive me.

Yours，

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假定你是李华。你和外教Susan约定在本周日上午教她制作中国结，但你因故无法前往。请用英语给她写一封电子邮件。内容包括：

1.表示歉意；

2.说明情况；

3.希望谅解。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

参考词汇：中国结Chinese knot

Dear Susan,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Susan,

I am sorry for not being able toteach you how to make Chinese knots on Sunday morning as I promised.I am writing to express my sincere apology to you.

The reason whyI am not availableis thatmy grandfather suddenly fell ill last night.Right now he is in hospital, so my parents and I have to take care of him on Sunday.I suggestmy friend Wang Wei go to your apartment at 9:00 am instead of me because she is skilled at making Chinese knots.I hope thischange will not cause you too much trouble.

Once again I’m sorry fornot keeping my promise.I hope you can forgive me.

Yours，

Li Hua

六、邀请信

假定你是李华，你校将于近期举办一场英语演讲比赛。请用英语给外教Mr.Black发一封电子邮件，邀请他担任评委。内容包括：

1.时间、地点；

2.邀请他担任评委；

3.期待收到回复。

注意：

1.词数100左右。

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Mr.Black,

Yours，

Li Hua

【考生习作】

Dear Mr.Black,

Long time no see!①I can hardly wait to tell you some exciting news that our school is going to hold the English Speech Contest next month.Now we are looking for a judge,which I think you are good at.②

Actually we can’t find a better than you.③Therefore on behalf of our school, I will invite you to be a judge.Besides,our topic is The Chinese Dreams and My Dream.As planned,every competitor who take part in the contest should limit his time to five minutes.④Last but not least, the contest will be held in our school auditorium this Friday afternoon.Don’t be late.⑤

I will be happy if you can accept my invitation.⑥Please reply to me as soon as possible.⑦

Yours，

Li Hua

存在问题：

1.主题不够突出。写信人在第一段应表明写作目的，向对方发出邀请。然后，告诉对方活动的时间、地点和注意事项，并希望对方接受邀请。

2.句①是口语中常见的一句客套话，用在书信中不恰当。这封信是写给外教的，应用委婉礼貌的语气，但句⑤和句⑦表达很随意，语言不得体。句③是废话，可删掉。

3.句②词不达意。本句应表明写信的目的，可换成：I am writing to invite you to be a judge。

4.句④和句⑥有语法错误。句④中的take应改为takes。句⑥应用虚拟语气。

【高分范文】

Dear Mr.Black,

My school is going to hold an English Speech Contest next week in order to enrich our campus life.I am writing to invite you to be one of the judges.

The event is to take place in the auditorium from 4:20 to 6:20 on the afternoon of next Friday.About 30 competitors will give a speech in English on“Dreams”within three minutes.Then they will have to answer a question given by the judges.Some teachers and foreign guests will work as judges.The winners will be announced at the scene.I am sure it will be great fun.

I would appreciate it if you could give an early reply.Looking forward to your participation.

Yours，

Li Hua

写作要点：

第一段：写信背景和写信目的

第二段：活动的具体内容和希望对方做什么

1.活动的具体内容；

2.希望对方做什么；

3.其他注意事项。

第三段：期待收到回复

【写作模板】

Dear ...,

...be going to ...I am writing to invite you to ...

The event is to take place in ...on the ...will ...Then ...will...I am sure it will be great fun.You’d better...

I would appreciate it if you could give me an early reply.Looking forward to your participation.

Yours，

Li Hua

【巩固练习】

假定你是李华, 和好友约定周日一起骑车去郊游。请给外教Cathy写一封英语邮件，邀请她一起参加。内容包括：

1.时间和地点；

2.主要活动；

3.注意事项。

注意：

1.词数100左右；

2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。

Dear Cathy,

Yours，

Li Hua

【套用模板】

Dear Cathy,

My friends and Iare going tovisit the Nature Parkon themorning of next Sunday.I’m writing to invite you to join us.

Weare tomeet at 8:30 am at the school gate and go there by bike.When we arrive, wewillwalk along the river and have a picnic in the forest nearby.After lunch we’ll play games,enjoy the beautiful scenery and take photos.Thenwewillreturn at 4:00 pm.I’m sure it will be great fun.You’d bettertake some snacks and drinking water.It is a good idea to wear comfortable shoes, a hat and a pair of sunglasses.

I would appreciate it if you could give me an early reply.Looking forward to your participation.

Yours，

Li Hua

总之，使用英语写作模板能帮助不同层次的考生提升英语写作能力。优秀考生掌握了不同英语文体的篇章结构特点和常用的表达法之后，写作语言更地道，行文更流畅。英语薄弱的考生和中等考生能够准确把握写作内容，可避免写跑题或偏离主题的现象。通过套用常用的句型，减少了文中的语法错误，提高了语言表达的准确性。虽然写作模板可能不利于优秀考生的自主发挥，但是笔者认为英语写作模板值得推广使用。