我的座机情结

2016-05-14赵云舒马玉芳

英语学习 2016年7期

赵云舒马玉芳

不知道你是否曾有过这样的经历：一家人围在一部电话旁，等待着远方亲人的消息；电话簿中记下班里那个女孩的电话号码，忐忑拨通后发现接听的却不是她；买张电话卡冲进路边的电话亭，拨下那串背得烂熟的号码……这些曾是好几代人的共同回忆。但在几乎人手一部手机的今天，固定电话似乎成了家中的多余之物。

Weve had the same landline for almost 40 years， since before anyone called it a “landline，” and its hard to give it up. Our phone number would be floating out there in space somewhere， whimpering like a dog that got left behind.2 And we have a cool number. Its got two zeros in it， just like my childhood phone number， only without the stigma3. Nobody liked to dial zeros back in the 1950s， when we all had rotary phones4. It took too much work， and if you were in a hurry your finger might slip out of the little hole before you got it all the way around，5 and then youd have to start over. But by the time we got the landline， all you had to do was push a button.

Still， this phone is annoying. Theres hardly ever anybody on the other end of it anymore that I want to talk to. Instead its someone telling me theres nothing wrong with my credit card. Or someone who wants to know how old my roof is， or if Id like to take a short survey. Its nobody I know.

One of the reasons people say you should keep the landline is that the connection is better， and you might want it for certain conversations. Which just goes to show how much weve forgotten about what a real phone—one with a cord6—should sound like.

They sounded wonderful. When direct long-distance dialing first became available， my mom would call her brother in North Dakota， and theyd spend an exhilarating minute telling each other they sounded as if they were in the next room.7 Then theyd hang up8. And it was true. People did sound as though they were in the next room.

Thats because their voices didnt have to guess where they were going. They got to travel inside honest-to-goodness enclosed wires the whole way， completely out of the weather， and theyd come out all creamy on the receiving end.9 Nowadays your voice has to find its way through the air and bump into mosquitoes and hurricanes and such， and by the time it gets to your friends phone it sounds as though its coming from the bottom of a box of crackers.10

But its considered an improvement because we dont have to be tethered11 to a wall， even though that wouldnt be the worst idea for a lot of us.

Anyway， back then， if you heard a little crackle on your phone， youd call up The Phone Company and theyd send out some guy with his name stitched on his shirt to polish it up for you free of charge.12 The wires were all tucked away inside the house through one neatly caulked hole in the siding.13 Now the landline brings in crunchy noises， like the sound of squirrels chewing.14 You dont report it as long as you can still make out the conversation， because it will cost you a hundred bucks to have some repairman poke a hole inside your house.15 If you can keep him outside， hell haul out a bunch of new wire and staple it in careless loops to the side of your house like bunting.16 But it does sound marginally better than the cellphone， because theres no delay.17

These days， when my landline rings， its usually a complete stranger calling to ask me how I am today， so I try to just let it ring. But its hard. I spent formative18 decades racing to answer the phone because otherwise Id have no idea who was on the other end. I still feel the urge to jump up and answer at the cellular level.19

So its probably no use. Ill have to keep the phone. Its securely fastened to my past，20 and I dont want to lose one more thing.

1. dial up：拨号；landline：座机，固话。

2. float：漂浮；whimper：抽泣，呜咽；leave behind：丢下。

3. stigma：耻辱，污名。

4. rotary phone：转盘电话。

5. slip out：不知不觉地滑掉； get sth. all the way around：完全解决，此处指拨完电话号码。

6. cord：此处指“电话线”。

7. North Dakota：北达科他州，美国中北部一州；exhilarating：令人欢欣的。

8. hang up：挂断（电话）。

9. 他们的声音通过真正的密封线缆进行传播，完全不受天气的影响，然后从听筒中柔和地传出。honest-to-goodness：真正的；enclosed：被包住的；creamy：（声音）柔和的；receiving end：接收端。

10. 现在，你的声音必须在空中传播，中间会遇见蚊子、飓风等等，等它到达你朋友的手机之时，听起来像是从饼干盒底部发出来的一样。bump into：偶然遇见；mosquito：蚊子；hurricane：飓风；cracker：薄脆饼干。

11. tether：用绳拴住，束缚。