一个中国高中毕业生的自白

文/Eric Mu 译/龙天麟 绘/七空



一个中国高中毕业生的自白

文/Eric Mu 译/龙天麟 绘/七空

When I was a kid， university graduates were as rare as unicorns， now they are more like popcorn：cheap and plentiful.

I have to say that high school is a monastery①monastery 英 ［'mɒnəst（ə）rɪ］ 美 ［'mɑnəstɛri］ n. 修道院；僧侣He has cloistered himself in a monastery for more than thirty years. 他隐居于修道院中已三十余年。and an army boot camp combined. Eleven classes every day. We had to rise before dawn and went to bed after 11. After the last class， we were encouraged to use any bit of extra time for study. There was one student who would go to read his lessons every night in the toilet， because that was the only place where the light would be kept on 24 hours. Everyone hatedhim， because his breach of a delicate equilibrium②equilibrium 英 ［,iːkwɪ'lɪbrɪəm; ,ekwɪ-］ 美 ［,ikwɪ'lɪbrɪəm］ n. 均衡；平静；保持平衡的能力But we know thermodynamics is all about equilibrium. 但我们知道热力学都是关于平衡的。that is vital for us to live in peace with each other -he just studied too hard. The school encouraged③encourage 英 ［ɪn'kʌrɪdʒ; en-］ 美 ［ɪn'kɝrɪdʒ］ vt. 鼓励，怂恿；激励；支持Economic policy is liberalized to encourage initiatives in production. 放宽经济政策以鼓励生产的积极性。us to be frugal with our time. It had a slogan hanging from the main building："Time is like water in sponge，if you squeeze harder， there is always more."

Even though you can always squeeze， even God may need to take a day off every week. For high school students， it was every four weeks. The day was meant for us to go home to pick up some spare clothes and money to sustain us for the next four weeks. But it also offered a rare chance of leisure. One day， think about it， ten hours of freedom，plus undisrupted sleep. How wonderful！ I always anticipated the day so much that I kept planning and planning： Going to the bookstore to read the history book that I hadn't finished？ Going to the noodle place in the market to have noodles with lamb soup？ When the day eventually came， not a single second passed without causing great anxiety in me like a stingy④stingy 英 ［'stɪn（d）ʒɪ］ 美 ［'stɪndʒi］ adj. 吝啬的，小气的；有刺的；缺乏的If she has a spending problem， then you need to work on it together， and if you'retoo stingy with your money and you never have fun with it， then you also to work on that and loosen up.如果她有爱花钱的毛病，那么你们应该共同解决这个问题，如果你在钱方面过于小气，你就永远也享受不到花钱的乐趣，你依然会致力于此并且放松下来。man counting every penny that he has to shell out.

Teachers are a mixture of army training sergeants and Amway salesmen. The former abuses， the latter promises. A teacher is not only expected to teach， he also needs to motivate⑤motivate 英 ［'məʊtɪveɪt］ 美 ［'motə'vet］ vt. 刺激；使有动机；激发……的积极性To do that， you need to motivate them， listen to them， connect with them， andsupport them when they need i.要做到这一点，你需要激励他们，倾听他们的心声，保持联络，并且在他们有需要时支持他们。. Some male teachers were very good at that， capable of evoking the deepest sense of shame in their subjects that even a Freudian would admire.

Three years of running this strenuous marathon. The inevitable climax was more of an anticlimax. The test didn't turn out to be as I had imagined⑥imagine 英 ［ɪ'mædʒɪn］ 美 ［ɪ'mædʒɪn］ vt. 想像；猜想；臆断 vi. 想像；猜想；想像起来One can imagine how regretful he was. 可以想像他是多么懊悔。it - a grand battle. I had been seeing myself on stage， with a war bugle blowing and bullets whizzing by and here I was， a soldier crouching in his trench and ready for a bayonet charge， to take my fate by its throat. The reality was much duller though. A room packed with 40 students huddling⑦huddle 英［'hʌd（ə）l］ 美 ［'hʌdl］ vt. 把……挤在一起；使缩成一团；草率了事vi. 蜷缩；挤作一团 n. 拥挤；混乱；杂乱一团The Emperors huddle together to protect themselves from the extreme cold ofAntarctica.帝企鹅们互相拥挤在一起来预防南极洲极度的寒冷。in front of their small desks，under the scrutiny of a surveillance cam and two chatty supervisors. We were no warriors but prisoners. If we were fighting for anything， it was just for our own survival.

当我还是小孩子时候，大学毕业生像独角兽般的珍贵，现在他们却像爆米花一样：便宜并且量多。

我只想说高中就是一座寺院和一个新兵训练营的合体。每天有十一节课。我们必须早起然后晚上11点才离开。在最后一节课后，我们又都被鼓励抓紧每一点空闲时间学习。有个同学他每晚会去厕所读书。然而每个人都讨厌他，因为这破坏了这种微妙的平衡，对我们和平相处至关重要——他学习有些太努力了。学校鼓励我们要节约时间。在我们主大楼上面挂着一个口号：“时间就像海绵中的水，只要你挤，总是有的。”

虽然你能一直挤，但就是老天爷也需要每周休息一天的。对于高中同学们，只有四个星期才有一天。这一天是让我们回家拿些衣服和钱来继续维持我们接下来的四个星期。但是它也提供了一丝放松的机会。一天，想一下，十个小时的自由，加上没人打扰的睡觉。多么美妙啊！我总是期盼着这一天，然后不停地计划着：去书店看看我没看完的历史类的书？去市场卖面的地方吃碗羊汤面？当这天真的到来时，我开心的过着每一秒，就像个吝啬鬼数着花出去的每一分钱。

老师就是军队训练官和安利销售人的结合体。前者虐待我们，后者许诺我们。老师不仅要教人，他也需要去激励人。有些男老师就很擅长这个，能在他们的课程中唤起我们内心最深处的愧疚之心，就连弗洛伊德都会钦佩他们的。

紧张的马拉松式长跑的三年。本以为最后到来的时刻会是高潮更多的却是失落。考试没有像我想象的那样——宏伟的战斗。我曾觉得自己是这样的，当军号响起，子弹就在耳旁飞过，而我就在那里，作为一个士兵蜷伏在战壕中并准备用刺刀冲锋，去扼住命运之喉。然而现实却更枯燥。一个屋子40个学生在他们的小桌子上缩成一团，在摄像头的监视之下，两个监考官闲聊着。我们不是战士只是囚犯而已。如果我们是在为什么而战斗，我想只是为了我们生存吧。

Confessions of a Chinese High School Student