依托主题语境，重视续写过程

广东 龙艳琴

读后续写的语篇都是围绕某一主题展开的，因此我们在写作的过程中，要以主题语境为依托来引领阅读，进而启发我们的写作。对主题意义的把握是读后续写非常重要的一部分，它关系到我们对语篇的理解，以及是否能准确把握续写的方向。

在续写的过程中，我们要始终以主题语境为依托去解读原文的基本信息，了解文章的情节、情感，构思故事的发展方向，思考续写点，只有这样，才能续写出符合故事情节发展的内容。

【案例导引】

A young man went to visit the oldest and wisest man in the village for some advice on how he could become rich.

“Treasure is yours: at the top of Yonder Mountain,”advised the wise old man as he pointed to a tall mountain in the distance.“You must travel on foot to the top of the mountain.There you will find riches beyond your belief.Once you leave the top of the mountain,whatever remains will be lost forever.”

The young man could hardly wait until the morning when he was to meet with the wise old man for final instructions.When he arrived at the wise old man's home,he saw a long,thick log(原木)lying on the ground in front of the house.

“You must carry this log on your journey to the top of the mountain,and it is a necessary part of your journey.You must take it with you to the top of the mountain to claim your treasure,”explained the wise old man.

The young man was not pleased with this sudden surprise, but he respected the wise old man and as he lifted the long,heavy log onto his shoulders and struggled down the road towards the mountain,he realized that the trip would not be as easy as he thought.

After he was walking for a while,a woodsman came up to him and said,“It looks like that log is pretty heavy.Would you like me to cut some of it to make it lighter?”

The young man was very tired, so he said,“I suppose that a little bit cut off the end wouldn't hurt.”And the woodsman cut two inches off the end.

A while later, the young man met a farmer on his way back from the fields. And the farmer helped him cut another two inches off the end.

At the bottom of the mountain, the young man met a trapper (捕杀动物者) who helped him cut four more inches off the log.

注意：

1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；

2.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好。

Paragraph 1:

The young man continued to struggle to climb the mountain._____________________

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Paragraph 2:

The excited young man lay the log across the gap and discovered that it was too short to cover the distance.___________________________________________________________

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文本解读

Step 1 Reading for the basic elements

When_Where_Who What_Why How Once________________________________________________________________________In a village___________________________________________________________________A young man,a wise old man,a woodsman,a farmer and a trapper________________________The wise old man told the young man how to become rich.The young man wanted to become rich._____________________________________________The wise old man instructed that the young man should carry a long,heavy log to reach the top of the mountain,where he could get the treasure he desired.

Step 2 Reading for the plots and emotions

?

Step 3 Conceiving possible plot developments

1.根据已给出的文本判断文章的立意。

原文叙述了一位年轻人向一位充满智慧的老人寻求建议，想知道如何变得富有。老人指着远处的高山，让年轻人扛着一根又长又重的木头去山顶，说那里有他想要的财宝。在路途中，年轻人觉得很累，因此接受了路人的友好帮助——砍掉了好几块木头。然而当年轻人到达山顶时，他才恍然大悟，原来那根木头是有重要用途的，这时他才明白了老人的良苦用心。

2.根据续写段落的段首句推测可能的续写情节和内容。

根据续写第一段的段首句“年轻人继续努力攀登那座山”和续写第二段的段首句“这个激动的年轻人把木头横放在缺口上……”可推测，续写第一段应描写年轻人如何艰难地爬到山顶的过程。

根据续写第二段的段首句“这个激动的年轻人把木头横放在缺口上，发现它……”可知，续写第二段可围绕到达山顶之后，年轻人是否看到财宝，以及他扛上山的那根木头最后有什么用进行续写。另外，为了突出主题，续写第二段可在结尾处写明年轻人最后明白了什么人生道理，进而升华文章的主题意义。

3.围绕续写第一段所给出的段首句以及上面的分析进行提问构思：

（1）How did the young man manage to get to the top of the mountain?

（2）What did he see in front of him and what did he do then?

（3）What does“the gap”in the next paragraph mean?

4.围绕续写第二段所给出的段首句以及上面的分析进行提问构思：

（1）What did the young man discover then?Was it related to the log?

（2）Did the young man get the treasure laid there before?

（3）How did he feel and what did he realize in the end?

Step 4 Rereading and rethinking for the continuation points

___续写点续写时可照应的内容原文开头伏笔A young man went to visit the oldest and wisest man in the village for some ad-_____________vice on how he could become rich.续写第二段要回应前文，最后年轻人是否实现了梦想，变得富有？冲突情节1.The young man could hardly wait to reach the top of the mountain but he had to carry the heavy log along with him.2. The woodsman, the farmer and the trapper helped cut the log but the log may be useful to the young man.主要人物的重要品质The old man:wise,helpful,instructive The young man:opportunistic前文中，年轻人迫不及待地想要到达山顶获得财宝，但他不得不扛着重重的木头前行，续写时要对此进行回应，解决这层冲突；同时，木头作为文章的重要线索，一定有特殊的作用，而年轻人却接受了路人的帮助，切掉了一些木块，导致其被破坏，这势必带来不好的后_________________________________________________果，续写时要体现出来。本文的主题立意是“成功需要脚踏实地地去努力、去奋斗，要拒绝走捷径，拒绝诱惑”，续写时，要照应前文对主要人物的品质的刻画。原文结尾At the bottom of the mountain, the young man met a trapper who helped him cut four more inches off the log.续写第一段要和原文保持空间上的衔接，年轻人如何从山脚爬到山顶，这个过程辛苦吗？注意提示“a trapper helped him cut four more inches off the log”。

（续表）

Step 5 Referring to the end

Paragraph 1:

The young man continued to struggle to climb the mountain.With great difficulty,finally he arrived at the top where a great deal of treasure came to his sight.The young man couldn't help bursting out,“It is the most beautiful treasure I have ever seen!”However,what stood between him and his treasure was a wide opening in the earth which surrounded the mountain top. There was only one way to get across the opening. Now it became clear why the wise old man had given him this long log to carry on his journey.

Paragraph 2:

The excited young man lay the log across the gap and discovered that it was too short to cover the distance.Seeing the treasure that couldn't be reached, how he regretted allowing the woodsman, the farmer and the trapper to cut eight inches off the long, heavy log. After many vain tries, the young man had to leave the top with sadness and regret. As he turned to walk down to the mountain side,he looked back with tearful eyes and his treasure slowly disappeared. It was not until then that he came to the realization that whoever wants to achieve dreams must experience the struggles first.

【模拟导练】

阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。

Once upon a time, there was a farmer living in the village with his wife and two sons.Every morning,he got up early to get water from the stream outside the village to his home.He carried the water in two pots that hung on either end of a pole balanced across shoulders.

One day,the farmer fell and the pots fell down to the ground.Luckily,only one of the pots got a crack in it and the other pot was perfect. From then on, the perfect pot always delivered a full portion of water from the stream, while the cracked pot always arrived at the house only half full.

For two years this went on, every day the farmer delivering one full and one half-full measures of water to his home.Naturally,the full pot was proud of its service,perfect to the end for which it had been made.But the poor cracked pot was unhappy and ashamed of its imperfection,miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure,the cracked pot spoke to the farmer by the stream one day.“I'm so ashamed of myself,”it said.“I want to apologize to you.”

“But why?”asked the farmer.

“For the past two years,”said the pot,“this crack in my side has let water leak out(渗漏) all the way to the house. You do the work carrying me from the stream to the house each day,but because of my disadvantage,you don't get full value from your effort,”sighed the sad pot. Kindly, the farmer told the distressed pot,“As we return to the house today,please notice the lovely flowers along the way.”

As they returned up the hill, the old cracked pot noticed the charming wild flowers

—the sun glistening (闪光)on their bright faces,the gentle wind bending their heads.But still, at the end of the trail, the faulty pot felt bad because it had again leaked out half its load,and again it apologized to the farmer for its failure.

注意：

1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；

2.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好。

Paragraph 1:

The farmer said to the pot,“Didn't you notice that the flowers were only on your side of the path?”________________________________________________________________

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Paragraph 2:

After listening to what the farmer said, the cracked pot finally understood and felt happy.__________________________________________________________________

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【评价导思】

1.续写故事符合原文的主旨吗？

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2.故事的结尾反映了什么样的主题？是否可以触动心灵，发人深省？

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3.对比你的文章和范文，两者有哪些异同？

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