读后续写，怎样科学训练？

陈光伟

读后续写是高考英语科目中的新题型。赋分25分，提供一段350词左右的语言材料，要求考生依据该材料内容和所给段落开头语进行续写，为其补充一篇150词左右，与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。读后续写题型包含了“阅读”“分析”“创作”，具有较大的难度，能综合考查我们运用英语的能力，包括：

（1）把握短文关键信息和语言特点的能力;

（2）语言运用的准确性和丰富性;

（3）对语篇结构的把控能力;

（4）创造性思维能力。

笔者在指导学生进行该题型训练时，主要有以下几个要求：

1. 分两段，150 -210词，建议用时30-40分钟;

2. 根据原文本、给出的两段的段首句和生活常识合理推断情节;不要给出太出人意料的结局，主题尽量正能量，积极向上;

3. 不增加旁支情节，不增加人物;故事完整，不在文末设置悬念;

4. 遵循原文总体基调和风格;

5. 适当穿插心理描写和环境描写;

6. 时态不可乱;

7. 可以在结尾进行总结或升华。

真题分析

（2020.01浙江）阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。

“Im going to miss you so much， Poppy，”said the tall， thin teenager. He bent down to hug his old friend goodbye. He stood up， hugged his parents， and smiled， trying not to let his emotions（情绪）get the better of him.

His parents were not quite able to keep theirs under control. They had driven their son several hours out of town to the university where he would soon be living and studying. It was time to say goodbye for now at least. The family hugged and smiled through misty eyes and then laughed.

The boy lifted the last bag onto his shoulder， and flashed a bright smile.“I guess this is it，”he said.“Ill see you back home in a month， okay？”His parents nodded， and they watched as he walked out of sight into the crowds of hundreds of students and parents. The boys mother turned to the dog，“Okay， Poppy， time to go back home.”

The house seemed quiet as a tomb without the boy living there. All that week， Poppy didnt seem interested in her dinner， her favorite toy， or even in her daily walk. Her owners were sad too， but they knew their son would be back to visit. Poppy didnt.

They offered the dog some of her favorite peanut butter treats. They even let her sit on the sofa， but the old girl just wasnt her usual cheerful self. Her owners started to get worried.“What should we do to cheer Poppy up？”asked Dad.“Weve tried everything.”

“I have an idea， but it might be a little crazy，”smiled Mom. “Without anybody left in the house but us， this place could use a bit of fun. Lets get a little dog for Poppy.

It didnt take long before they walked through the front door carrying a big box. Poppy welcomed them home as usual but when she saw the box， she stopped. She put her nose on it. Her tail began wagging（擺动）ever so slowly， then faster as she caught the smell.

注意：

1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右;

2. 续写部分分为两段， 每段的开头语已为你写好;

Para 1. Dad opened the box and a sweet little dog appeared. ______________________________________________________________________________

Para 2. A few weeks later， the boy arrived home from university. _________________________________________________

__________________________

步驟一，精读理解语篇

读后续写类似阅读理解题中对文章后续发展的推断，如“What would happen next？”。因此我们首先需要对语篇进行精读理解，保证续写部分不偏离主题，不发生情节性错误。这篇材料讲的是孩子上学离家，为了让家里的小狗不感到孤单，父母打算给它找个伴。

另外，学生应该通过观察语篇的优质表达感受其语言风格，选词方面尽量与其接近。如：hug his old friend goodbye， get the better of him， smiled through misty eyes， lifted the last bag onto his shoulder， flashed a bright smile， quiet as a tomb， it didnt take long before等。

步骤二，构思续写内容。

按照故事发展的要素（起因、经过、转折、高潮、结局），学生构思续写内容。通常题目的文章已经包括故事要素的前三者（起因、经过、转折）。本题中，起因为孩子上学和送别（1至3段），经过为Poppy变得闷闷不乐（4至5段），转折则是他们打算多添一只小狗（6至7段）。因此学生应只要在后两者（高潮、结果）上发挥，建议两个要素各一段。

通过分析故事发展，以及续写两段给出的提示句“Dad opened the box and a sweet little dog appeared.”和“A few weeks later， the boy arrived home from university.”，我们可以确定高潮应是Poppy和小狗的互动，结局是男孩回家，获得惊喜。应该让故事完整，不要在文末再设悬念。

步骤三，写好关键位置句。

关键位置句指的是续写部分第一段和第二段的第二句，以及第一段的最后一句。因为这三句和提示句最接近，最能体现续写部分和提示句的衔接关系，写好了能充分体现学生对语篇结构的把控能力。比如第二段的提示句为“A few weeks later， the boy arrived home from university”，则第一段的最后一句最好能提到the boy或者arrive home等元素，与上下文形成呼应。

步骤四，打磨细节语言。

在续写中，在保证语言通畅的前提下，应尽量多使用从句、非谓语动词、倒装句、强调句等语法结构。另外，还应该多用心理描写、环境描写以及描述性的动作词汇，来描写细节、烘托气氛，使文章充满真情实感和可读性。注意不要大量使用对话描写，建议对话不要超过两个话轮。

步骤五，检查修改。

最后，我们应检查全文的故事情节是否完整，所续写内容是否符合逻辑，与原文和所给段首提示语是否连贯，语法结构、句型结构是否使用准确，所续写内容的词数是否达标，标点符号的使用、单词拼写与字母大小写等等。

学生习作

Dad opened the box and a sweet little dog appeared. Poppys eyes shone as she saw the puppy crawling out. She showed great love to the adorable creature which was given the name Berger. In the following days， she looked after Berger as if his mother， soon making them inseparable. Sometimes while taking a stroll in the park， with Dads help， she would teach Berger to respond to the orders just as how she did with the boy. Seeing her become cheerful again， the parents felt rather released. However， actively as Poppy acted， she knew her life was coming to an end.

A few weeks later， the boy arrived home from university. It should have been a good day for him but for the painful news that Poppy had passed away. To ease grief by diverting his attention， he tried to interact with Berger. In surprise， he found Berger rather acquainted with his orders. He seemed to see Poppy back again.“She made great efforts to train the little dog， just to find you a new companion.”Mom choked，“Her life will be carried on. So does her love.”The boy stood transfixed， with his eyes blurred by tears.

[教师点评]

该篇习作的语言方面做到了平衡、全面。首先，用词较为准确，细节性用词也比较多，如crawl， stroll， release， transfix等，这些词汇不仅准确地描述出人物的动作，而且使得环境描写也更为生动。其次，句型结构也比较多样化，从句、as if、非谓语动词、倒装的使用也使得文章的可读性强，如she looked after Berger as if his mother， soon making them inseparable等。并且，作者在主语的设置方面也有讲究，每段使用的主语都比较统一，如第一段基本都是she，第二段基本都是男孩he，语流比较通畅。这篇文章反映出该生课外阅读较多，平时应有较多练笔。

在立意方面，续写中没有增加旁支情节，也没有增加人物。然而，原文没有任何Poppy即将去世的信息，如此续写较出人意料，不易接受。在衔接方面，第一段最后一句和第二段的开头衔接欠缺，可以写Poppy知道自己生命即将结束并且她在等男孩回来，这样与第二段开头的“男孩回来”衔接更自然。另外，Poppy垂垂老矣和去世中间没有任何文字过渡，阅读的时候也有点猝不及防。建议在立意和衔接方面进行修改。

作文范例

Dad opened the box and a sweet little dog appeared. The little puppy， cute with yellow curly hair， slowly crawled out of the box. At first he was a bit shy， but soon got familiar with Poppy. It didn't take long before the two took enormous pleasure in one anothers company. His parents was released to see this but kept the secret of the new family member， waiting for the boy to come back and find it out himself.

A few weeks later， the boy arrived home from university. He couldnt wait to see his family， including Poppy， since it was the first time that he had been away from home for such a long time. When he opened the door and caught sight of poppy tumbling about on the floor with a puppy， he was stunned. His parents laughed at the look of surprise on his face and explained why. “Now Poppy wont be lonely when you are away.”

責任编辑 蒋小青