Direction 1 话题写作
2018-09-07
开学第一天
语言风暴
Ⅰ.写作高频词汇〈明其义〉
1.campus校园
2.canteen餐厅
3.laboratory/lab实验室
4.dining hall食堂
5.dormitory宿舍
6.club俱乐部
7.competition竞赛
8.reward奖励
9.achievement/result成绩
10.marks/grades/scores分数11.prepare lessons备课
12.have lessons上课
13.prepare for lessons预习功课14.work hard at努力做/学
15.put one's heart into专心于
16.concentrate on全神贯注;专心于
17.after-school/extracurricular activities课外活动
18.voluntary labor义务劳动
19.take an active part in physical activities
积极参加体育活动
20.have a party举行晚会
21.learn...by heart记住
22.keep...in mind记住
23.make progress in...在……方面取得进步
24.have a good command of...精通……
25.lay a good foundation in...在……方面打下良好的基础
26.take part in参加
27.return/come back to school返校
28.make up one's mind下定决心
Ⅱ.主题精彩表达〈悉其用〉
(1)见到新的老师和同学,我太高兴了!(使用How引导的感叹句)
How nice it is to see my new teachers and classmates!
(2)踏进大门,学校总是让我想起作为一个学生所肩负的责任。(使用动名词作主语)
Stepping into the gate of the school always reminds me of the responsibility I carry as a student.
(3)在新的环境中我是多兴奋啊!(使用How引导的感叹句)
How excited I felt in the new environment!
(4)能和新同学交朋友,能向新老师学习是我巨大的荣幸。(使用it作形式主语)
It's my greatest honor to make friends with my new classmates and learn from my new teachers.
(5)我在学习及与同学相处上可能会有困难,在生活中承受着一些压力。(使用现在分词表结果)
I might have difficulties in learning and getting along with classmates,bearing some pressure in life.
(6)我肯定会坚强地度过高中三年的每一阶段。(使用It is certain that...)
It is certain that I will get stronger and get through every step of high school in the three years yet to come.
(7)这是我见到的最美的校园。(使用that引导的定语从句)
This is the most beautiful campus that I have ever seen.
(8)我和我的同学对校园里的新鲜事都非常感兴趣。
My classmates and I are interested in the new things on the campus.
任务呈现
今天是你进入高中的第一天,请根据以下要点用英语写一篇日记,并向学校《英语园地》投稿。内容包括:
1.校园环境;
2.对老师和同学们的印象;
3.自己的感受。注意:
1.词数100左右(格式及首句已给出,但不计入总词数);
2.可以适当增加细节,以使行文连贯。
September 1st,Thursday Fine
Today is my first day at Senior High school.
写作指导
一、审题与定调
本写作体裁为日记,主要描述开学第一天的所见及所感。写作时要注意要点全面,层次清晰。本写作以陈述当天发生的事为主,故时态以一般过去时为主,人称则以第一人称为主。
二、写作微技能点拨
步入高中后的第一天,你一定会有许许多多的新鲜感受。巧妙地使用表示情绪类的形容词是描写个人感受的最佳途径!常见的情绪类形容词有excited,delighted,interested,determined,以及inspired等。
三、布局与行文
结构 写作要点 普通表达 升级表达第一部分描写校园环境●W h e n I w e n t i n t o t h e s c h o o l,I f o u n d i t s o b e a u t i f u l.●G r e e n t r e e s a n d d i f f e r e n t k i n d s o f f l o w-e r s a r e h e r e a n d t h e r e.O u r s c h o o l s e e m s l i k e a b i g g a r d e n.●W h e n I w e n t i n t o m y s c h o o l,I s a w a t a l l t e a c h i n g b u i l d i n g.O n t h e t o p o f i t,o u r n a t i o n a l f l a g w a s f l y i n g.●T h e a i r h a d t h e s m e l l o f f l o w e r s.I t m a d e m e f e e l r e l a x e d.●E n t e r i n g t h r o u g h t h e s c h o o l g a t e,I w a s a m a z e d a t i t s b e a u t i f u l s c e n e r y.●W i t h g r e e n t r e e s a n d d i f f e r e n t k i n d s o f f l o w e r s e v-e r y w h e r e,o u r s c h o o l l o o k s l i k e a b i g g a r d e n.●O n s t e p p i n g i n t o m y s c h o o l,I s a w a t a l l t e a c h i n g b u i l d i n g,o n t h e t o p o f w h i c h o u r n a t i o n a l f l a g w a s f l y i n g.●T h e a i r w a s f i l l e d w i t h t h e s m e l l o f f l o w e r s,w h i c h m a d e m e f e e l r e l a x e d.第二部分描述你对老师和同学们的印象●A l l m y n e w t e a c h e r s a r e k i n d a n d p a-t i e n t.●T h e y u s e d i f f e r e n t t e a c h i n g m e t h o d s.●S h e u s e d a n e w m e t h o d o f t e a c h i n g.I h a d n e v e r e x p e r i e n c e d i t b e f o r e.●A l l m y c l a s s m a t e s a r e f r i e n d l y a n d h a r d-w o r k i n g.●I h o p e m a n y o f t h e m w i l l b e m y f r i e n d s./I h o p e t o m a k e m a n y n e w f r i e n d s.●T h e n I w a s h a p p y t o f i n d t h a t m y n e w t e a c h e r s w e r e n o t o n l y e n t h u s i a s t i c b u t a l s o e x p e r i e n c e d.●T h e i r t e a c h i n g m e t h o d s s e e m e d n e w a n d e f f e c t i v e.●I w a s a t t r a c t e d b y h e r n e w m e t h o d o f t e a c h i n g,w h i c h I h a d n e v e r e x p e r i e n c e d b e f o r e.●A l l m y c l a s s m a t e s a r e f r i e n d l y a n d d i l i g e n t.●I'm l o o k i n g f o r w a r d t o m a k i n g f r i e n d s w i t h t h e m.第三部分表达自己的感受●I c a n't f o r g e t m y f i r s t d a y a t S e n i o r H i g h s c h o o l.●I t h i n k I'l l h a v e h a p p y h i g h s c h o o l d a y s.●I w i l l m a k e p r o g r e s s h e r e.●M y f i r s t d a y a t S e n i o r H i g h s c h o o l m a d e a d e e p i m p r e s s i o n o n m e.●I'm s u r e I'l l s p e n d m y h i g h s c h o o l d a y s h a p p i l y.●I b e l i e v e w i t h e x c e l l e n t t e a c h e r s h e l p i n g m e,I w i l l m a k e g r e a t p r o g r e s s h e r e.
【范文对比】
普通范文
September 1st,Thursday Fine
Today is my first day at Senior High school.①When I went into the school, I found it so beautiful.②Green trees and different kinds of flowers are here and there.Our school seems like a big garden.
③All my new teachers are kind and patient.④They use different teaching methods.At the first lesson,I felt nervous at first,but I was soon relaxed after our teacher asked us to introduce ourselves to each other.Besides, ⑤all my classmates are friendly and hard-working.⑥I hope many of them will be my friends.
⑦I can't forget my first day at Senior High school.⑧I think I'll have happy high school days.
高级范文
September 1st,Thursday Fine
Today is my first day at Senior High school.①Entering through the school gate,I was amazed at its beautiful scenery.②With green trees and different kinds of flowers everywhere,our school looks like a big garden.
③Then I was happy to find that my new teachers were not only enthusiastic but also experienced.④Their teaching methods seemed new and effective.In the English class, Mr Smith, our foreign teacher from America,told us about his interesting experiences in China.Besides, ⑤all my classmates are friendly and diligent.⑥I'm looking forward to making friends with them.
⑦My first day at Senior High school made a deep impression on me.⑧I'm sure I'll spend my high school days happily.
温馨贴士:仔细阅读这两篇文章,我们会发现相同标号的内容采用了不同的表达方式来表达相同或相近的含义。因此,大家在平时的写作中,应该多使用一些复杂结构或高级词汇;同时,也应学会使用简单词汇或句式来表达复杂的意思。另外,高级范文表达中的部分词汇虽目前尚未学到,但都属于课标词汇,学有余力的同学可以提前学习掌握。
类文跟进
假定你是李华,请用英语给你的新西兰网友Jack写一封电子邮件,描述你上高中第一天的见闻及感受。注意:
1.词数100左右;
2.开头和结尾已给出,但不计入总词数。
规范写作
Dear Jack,
How are you?I want to tell you something about my first day at Senior High school.
Best wishes,
Li Hua
评价反思
答题规范评价项目 项目得分或档次A.整洁完美 B.较为整洁 C.涂改较多 D.无法辨识A.篇幅适中 B.减掉2分卷面整洁性篇幅规范性要点完整性A.完整无缺 B.个别遗漏 C.遗漏较多 D.偏题跑题语言质量结构清晰性用词准确性语法正确性表达丰富性篇章逻辑行文流畅性A.准确无误 B.些许错误 C.错误较多 D.词不达意A.正确无误 B.些许错误 C.错误较多 D.语法混乱A.丰富多样 B.较为丰富 C.表达单调 D.词汇堆砌A.流畅自然 B.较为流畅 C.部分阻滞 D.完全阻滞A.灵活自如 B.较为灵活 C.些许体现 D.完全缺失写作微技能个人评级及得分老师评级及得分改进措施及总结
附:高考写作评分原则
(1)本题总分为25分,按5个档次(依次为21~25分、16~20分、11~15分、6~10分,以及1~5分)给分。
(2)评分时,先根据文章的内容和语言初步确定其所属档次,然后以该档次的要求来衡量,确定或调整档次,最后给分。
(3)词数少于80和多于120的,从总分中减去2分。
(4)评分时,应注意的主要内容为:内容要点、应用词汇和语法结构的数量和准确性、上下文的连贯性。
(5)拼写与标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面,评分时,应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑。同一单词用英式拼写或美式拼写均可接受。
(6)如书写较差,以致影响交际,将分数降低一个档次。