Young South Koreans Embrace Single Life韩国年轻人乐享单身生活

阮忠/文　孟洁冰/译

From honjok1—taking part in activities alone—to bihon—pledging never to marry—a pushback against the traditional family unit is reshaping society.

从独自参加活动的“独身族”到发誓终身不结婚的“不婚”人士，对传统家庭单位的抵制正在重塑社会。

Min Kyeong-seok is not shy about eating in restaurants alone， or staying in luxury hotels by himself， and shares his experiences online in his blog “One happy person”.

对于一个人在餐馆吃饭或是独自住豪华酒店，闵庆锡（音译）没觉得不好意思，他在自己的博客“一个快乐的人”中分享了亲身经历。

“I want to show people that I am living a happy life despite being single，” says Min， 37.

“我想让人们知道，尽管我是单身，但我生活得很快乐。” 37岁的闵庆锡说。

“South Koreans often view single people as pitiful， lonely， or lacking something be it economically， psychologically or even physically.

“韩国人通常认为单身的人孤独可怜，或者在经济、心理甚至生理方面有什么缺陷。”

“But I dont need to be with others to enjoy a delicious meal. If anything， the service is better.”

“可我享用佳肴不一定非要人陪。要我说，独自用餐得到的服务还更周到呢。”

Opting to engage in activities alone is a growing trend in South Korea. It even has its own word， “honjok”， a combination of the Korean words for “by myself” and “tribe”. People who follow a honjok lifestyle do so willingly and confidently， not caring about the judgement of others. Min is among an increasing number of young people in the country embracing single life. Some have chosen to stay unattached， while others are delaying marriage and children. Some women are taking single living further and ruling out matrimony altogether， a choice known as “bihon”.

在韩国，选择独来独往的趋势日渐增长。甚至出现了特有的叫法“独身族”，由韩文的“独身”和“族”组成。“独身族”人士心甘情愿、满怀信心地按照这种方式生活，并不在乎别人的评价。在韩国，越来越多的年轻人乐于享受单身生活，闵庆锡就是其中之一。有些年轻人选择了独身，有些年轻人则推迟结婚生子。有些女性则更进一步，不仅独自生活，还完全拒绝婚姻，这种选择被称为“不婚”。

Single-living boom

独居热潮

People in their 20s and 30s constitute the largest age groups of single-person households. Marriage and birth rates in the country are at record lows， as young people blame the high cost of living and home ownership for their reluctance to tie the knot. In South Korea， owning a house is traditionally seen as a prerequisite for marriage and in the past four years， the average price of an apartment in the capital Seoul has doubled.

从年龄段上看，单人家庭中占比最大的是二三十岁的年轻人。韩国的结婚率和出生率都创下历史最低水平，而年轻人把不愿结婚的原因归咎于高昂的生活成本和自有住房成本。在韩国，有一套房子历来被视为结婚的先决条件，而在过去四年里，首都首尔的公寓平均价格已经翻了一番。

Raising children is also becoming more expensive and the burden of private education—seen by many South Koreans as essential—has put many off plans to start a family.

养育孩子的成本也變得更高，许多韩国人认为私教是必不可少的支出，这项负担让很多人推迟了生育计划。

Joongseek Lee， a professor at Seoul National University who researches single-person households， says while South Korea remains a collective and patriarchal society there is a rising tendency “to stay alone or to become independent when one has the chance.”

首尔大学研究单人家庭的教授李宗熙（音）说，虽然韩国仍然是集体父权制社会，但是“独处或时机成熟就独立生活”的趋势日益上升。

While attitudes are changing， traditional expectations remain. For women， this includes marriage by 30， quitting their jobs to become mothers and full-time housewives. For men， it is providing a house and being the breadwinner.

虽然人们的观念在改变，但传统期望依然存在。对女性的期望包括在30岁前结婚，辞掉工作成为母亲和全职家庭主妇。对男性的期望则是提供房子和养家糊口。

Min says the countrys traditional structures prevent him from being himself， and instead he wants to have a “flexible” life.

闵庆锡说，韩国的传统社会结构让他无法活出自我，而他想过一种“灵活”的生活。

“In Korean society， you feel as if you are constantly being assigned missions， from going to a good school and university， to getting a job， getting married， and having kids. When you dont fulfil your set of predetermined missions， you will be judged and asked why not.”

“在韓国社会，你感觉好像自己不停地被分派任务，先是进一所好学校、上一所好大学，然后是找工作、结婚、生孩子。要是你没有完成事先安排好的这一系列任务，就会有人评判你，问你为什么没有完成。”

The rise of honjok and bihon

“独身族”和“不婚”的出现

For Seoul-based university student Lee Ye-eun， rampant gender inequality has influenced her way of life. South Korea has the worst gender pay gap among OECD countries. The country ranked last on The Economists Glass Ceiling Index2 for a ninth consecutive year， measuring where women have the best and worst chances of equal treatment at work.

对于住在首尔的大学生李艺恩（音）来说，严重的性别不平等影响了她的生活方式。在经合组织国家中，韩国的男女薪酬差距最大。在《经济学人》评估各国女性在不同方面获得平等职场待遇几率大小的“玻璃天花板指数”中，韩国连续第九年排名倒数第一。

Lee has declared her bihon status， vowing never to marry.

李艺恩宣称她是不婚状态，发誓终身不会结婚。

“Im not going to date， Im not going to marry， and Im certainly not going to have a baby—even if you give me money，” says the 25-year-old.

“我不会约会，不会结婚，当然也不会生孩子——就算你给我钱也不会。”这个25岁的女孩说。

“I didnt pledge not to get married because there are no good men， but because society dictates that women be in a more disadvantageous position when they enter a relationship.”

“我发誓不结婚不是因为没有好男人，而是因为社会迫使女性在婚恋关系中处于更不利的地位。”

New businesses and offerings have emerged to cater for the swelling single and solo-living markets in South Korea.

为了迎合韩国日益增长的单身和独居市场，新的业务和产品不断涌现出来。

The Seoul city government has created a task-force developing services for single-person households， such as low-cost security cameras， workshops on mental health and opportunities for singles to make kimchi—a staple in any household.

首尔市政府成立了一个工作组，为单人家庭策划各种服务，比如安装低成本安保摄像头、开展心理健康研讨会和为单身人士提供制作泡菜（韩国家庭的主要食品）的机会。

Hotels are also trying to attract solo customers with “me-time” single occupancy staycation3 packages. Eating alone， also known as “honbap” and part of the honjok lifestyle， is predicted to grow as a trend， including at expensive restaurants. Convenience stores are providing more customised products and services for people living alone. And the pet economy is expected to surge in the coming years， according to Korea Rural Economic Research Institute， as more people opt for pets over parenthood.

酒店也尝试推出“私享时光”宅度假单人套餐来吸引单身顾客。作为“独身族”生活方式的一部分，“独食”（独自用餐）预计将成为一种趋势，昂贵的餐厅也不例外。便利店为独居人士提供更多专属产品和服务。韩国农村经济研究院的数据显示，随着越来越多的人选择饲养宠物而不是为人父母，宠物经济预计将在未来几年大幅增长。

Expanding the idea of family

扩展家庭概念

Lee Ye-eun says embracing single life over the binds of marriage and child-rearing creates room for other pastimes.

李艺恩说，摆脱结婚育儿的束缚享受单身，为其他消遣活动创造了空间。

Time with her close friends has become more precious， and she hopes to create a community of like-minded individuals. Through an app for bihon women， she joined a sports group that she meets with several times a week for activities such as climbing and football.

李艺恩与密友相处的时光变得更加可贵，她希望創建一个由志同道合的人士组成的社群。通过一款专门为“不婚”女性设计的应用程序，她加入了一个运动小组，每周大家都会见几次面，一起开展登山和足球等活动。

Kang Ye-seul， 27， is a university employee who has also opted never to get married. She says staying single gives her more freedom and allows her to pursue hobbies and hang out with her non-married friends.

27岁的姜艺瑟（音译）是一名大学职员，她也选择了终身不结婚。她说单身带来了更多的自由，让她可以追求自己的爱好，和未婚朋友一起出去玩。

“I feel like Im in a completely different world，” Kang says positively of her life decision.

“我觉得我生活在一个完全不同的世界。”姜艺瑟积极地评价她的人生选择。

“In the past， I longed for happiness， wondered what it was， by what criteria to evaluate it， and curious about other peoples standards，” she says.

“过去，我渴望幸福，想知道幸福是什么，用什么标准来评判幸福，对别人的评判标准感到好奇。”她说。

She remains cautiously optimistic about the place of single people in society.

她对单身人士在社会中的地位仍然持谨慎乐观的态度。

“A sense of freedom and happiness followed after I learned that I could live a bihon life. Now， no matter what I do， its a choice only for me， so I dont feel burdened or afraid of any responsibility that comes with it. I dont think Ill ever be as unhappy as before.”

“我得知自己可以过‘不婚生活后，一种自由和幸福的感觉油然而生。现在，无论我做什么，这都是我自己的选择，所以我不觉得有负担，也不害怕随之而来的责任。我想，我再也不会像以前那样不开心了。”

Government attitudes and social awareness toward single-person households are still lagging compared to the direction in which society is moving， Kang says. She would like to see a society that is more accommodating to nontraditional household structures such as living together without being married or related to each other.

姜艺瑟说，相比社会发展趋势，政府对单人家庭的态度和大众对单人家庭的认知仍然滞后。她希望看到一个更加包容非传统家庭结构的社会，比如在不结婚或没有亲属关系的情况下共同生活。

In 2021， the government announced it would look into expanding the scope of the term “family” which could eventually include cohabitation and single parenthood， the latter of which continues to be stigmatised.

2021年，韩国政府宣布将研究扩展“家庭”的定义范围，最终可能包括同居伴侣和单亲父母，而后者一直受到污名化。

“There are still limitations to the system for single-person households，” Kang told The Guardian.

姜艺瑟在接受《卫报》采访时表示：“单人家庭的制度仍然存在局限性。”

“But I also see things positively given that such households are only going to increase in number.”

“但我也看到了积极的一面，因为这类家庭的数量只会越来越多。”

1这是一个结合了hon（独身）和jok（族群）两个词的新造词，指那些乐意独自活动的人。

2经济学术语，用于描述某个国家中女性在职场上晋升的难度。指数评估对象国包括经合组织38个成员国中的29个成员国（以发达国家为主），评估项目包括两性高等教育和收入差距、女性劳动参与度、女性高管占比、育儿费用、两性育儿休假情况等。

3 staycation在家中（或附近）度假（而不是到别处旅行）。