女儿上幼儿园的第一天

I put my sunglasses on and took a deep breath. With her hand held tightly in mine， we started walking down the street to her first day of school. I knew in a few minutes that she would be crying， she always cries when she was anxious about new experiences. But I also knew that once inside the room， she would thrive[旺盛].

As we walked， she asked me if I would be waiting right outside the front door when school was over.

“How will I find you？” she asked.

“Well pick a spot for me to stand so you know exactly where to look， okay？” I answered.

“What if no one talks to me？”

“The teacher will talk to you. Shell help you find your seat and shell even introduce you all to each other. And you already know two friends in the class from preschool[學前班]. I bet they are nervous too.”

She looked away and started to fidget[摆弄] with her backpack strap[带]. Its the same backpack that we spent 20 minutes packing up the night before. And the same one that she slipped her small stuffed animal[毛绒动物玩具] puppy into when she thought I wasnt looking this morning.

“What if I get shy and cant talk to anyone？”

“You might feel shy at first，” I said to her， “but give yourself a little time and youll realize that you are having fun and feeling more comfortable.”

She looked up at me and smiled， as we waited at a stop sign. “Im scared but really excited.”

“What are you the most excited for？”

“PE.”

I laughed because this is the same girl who weeks before told me she was exhausted[筋疲力尽的] from running one block down the street and needed to rest and drink water to refuel.

As we turned the corner， her face dropped. The massive[大量的] group of students gathered everywhere overwhelmed[受打击，淹没] her and her face instantly fell as the tears welled up in her eyes.

“You can do this， sweetie. Everyone has a place in line， lets go to find yours.”

We lined up with her class and just as she was about to cling to[紧握不放] my leg for dear life[拼命地，不顾死活地]， her friend from preschool stood next to her. In an instant， she lit up. They soon realized they both have the same backpack and reached out for each others hand. And as the teacher began to walk them all into the school， she was smiling. Not crying， not grabbing onto me， but smiling.

But when I saw those little feet walk into that big building， it all hit me and I felt the emotion of the moment. I hid the tears behind my sunglasses and waved a bit too excitedly as she walked inside. But the beauty of that moment was that it was only a moment. I wiped my eyes， held my husbands hand and we walked away feeling happy. Feeling proud.

All day I wondered what she was doing. Was she making friends？ Did she find the bathroom okay？ Was anyone mean to her？ Could she put the straw in one of those challenging juice boxes？

As I waited for her at pick up， I felt like a kid standing in line to meet Santa. She came out with her hand waving and her arms outstretched[伸开].

“I didnt cry again， Mommy，” she said， excited to hug me and show me her backpack full of goodies[好吃的东西].

After two hours of hearing the details of her day， we laughed and talked as a family about all the adventures she had.

And as I kissed her goodnight and told her how proud I was of her， she turned to me and said， “I love school. But I was upset about one thing.”

“Oh？ Whats that？” I asked.

“They dont have any Barbies there.”

I smiled and for a second felt jealous that theres a place in the world that doesnt have Barbies， considering that a village of them reside in my home.

But if the one thing she didnt like was a lack of Barbies， well then， I think I can say that it was a good day.

戴上墨镜，我深吸一口气。将女儿的手紧紧地抓在手里，我们开始踏上了她第一天上学的道路。我知道几分钟后她就会嚎啕大哭。当她对新事物感到焦虑时，她总会哭泣。但我也知道，一旦进入教室，她又会活蹦乱跳起来。

走着走着，她问我放学后我会不会在前门等着她。

“我要怎么找到你呢？”她问。

“我们可以找一个固定位置，这样你就知道去哪里找我了，好吗？”我回答道。

“要是没人和我说话怎么办？”

“老师会和你说话的。她会帮助你找到你的座位，甚至还会让你和其他同学相互介绍。而且你已经在学前班认识两个朋友了。我敢打赌他们肯定也很紧张。”

她扭头看向别处，开始摆弄她的背包带子——那个我们昨晚花了20分钟收拾好的背包;那个她偷偷将她的毛绒小狗塞进去的背包，就在今天早上她以为我没看到的时候。

“要是我太害羞，不敢和其他人说话怎么办？”

“刚开始你也许会感到害羞，”我对她说，“但给自己一点时间，你会发现自己玩得很开心，而且感到越来越自在。”

在我们等红灯的时候，她抬头看着我，笑着说：“我很害怕，但也很激动。”

“你对什么感到最激动？”

“体育课。”

我笑了。因为几个星期以前，就是这个女孩告诉我，跑过一个街区让她感到筋疲力尽，需要休息和喝水来补充能量。

当我们转过街角的时候，她脸就黑了。一大群学生从四面八方涌过来，将她淹没其中，她的脸立马拉下来，眼里满是泪水。

“你可以做到的，亲爱的。每个人在队伍里都有他的位置，让我们去找找你的位置。”

我们和她的同学站在一排，就在她刚要死命抓住我的大腿时，她的学前班朋友站到了她旁边。她瞬间就变得快活起来。不久她们就意识到彼此背着一模一样的背包，然后就拉住了对方的小手。当老师开始带领她们走进学校的时候，她是笑着的。没有哭喊，没有抓住我不放，而是笑着的。

然而当我看到一双双小脚走进那大大的建筑时，错杂的感情袭上心头。那一刻，我情难自抑。我将泪水隐藏在墨镜背后。在她走进去的时候，我有些过于激动地挥舞着手臂。然而那一瞬间的美丽是因为它只有短短一瞬。我擦干眼泪，拉着丈夫的手离开了——快乐地、自豪地。

整整一天，我都在想她在做什么。她交到新朋友了嗎？她会自己上厕所吗？有人对她不好吗？她能将吸管插进那些极具挑战性的盒装果汁里吗？

当我在接她的地方等她的时候，我觉得自己好像一个在排队等着见圣诞老人的小孩。她出来了，冲我挥手，张开双臂跑向我。

“我没有再哭了，妈咪，”她一边说着一边兴奋地拥抱我、给我展示她那装满小零嘴的背包。

听她讲了两个小时的上学细节后，我们一家哈哈大笑地谈论着她这一天的奇妙经历。

我给了她一个晚安吻，并告诉她我多么为她感到骄傲。她转过身，对我说：“我喜欢学校。但有一件事让我感到伤心。”

“哦？是什么？”我问道。

“学校里一个芭比娃娃也没有。”

我笑了起来，我们家里可是有一个村庄那么多的芭比娃娃，有那么一秒我嫉妒这世上居然有一个地方没有芭比娃娃。

但如果她不喜欢的只是没有芭比娃娃的话，那么，我想我可以说今天是很棒的一天。