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The Spring Festival

2019-09-10胡端楠

疯狂英语·爱英语 2019年7期
关键词:教師笔友被动语态

胡端楠

【题目要求】

你的英国笔友想了解你最喜爱的中国节日——春节。请你结合下列提问,介绍一下这个节日,约100词。

1.When is it?  2. What do people eat and do?  3. Why do you like it so much?

【学生习作】

Today, let me introduce my favorite Chinese festival, the Spring Festival.

Its celebrated from January 1 to January 15 in the lunar calendar. During this festival, almost everyone goes back where they are from. We always eat a big dinner with all of our family members and enjoy ourselves.

Its my favorite festival because I can buy new clothes, eat many snacks and get red envelopes from the elders. I can also play happily without homework or exams.

In a word, the Spring Festival is a symbol of reunion and warm in every Chinese heart. Thats why I like the Spring Festival best.

【教師点评】

本文用“总—分—总”的模式进行写作:第一段点题开篇,说明小作者最爱的节日是春节;第二段介绍春节的时间和人们的活动;第三段说明自己喜爱春节的原因;第四段是春节给人们带来的感受,总结全文。

行文中使用了elders和reunion等高级单词,with all of our family members、without homework or exams、in a word等短语,以及由where引导的地点状语从句、被动语态句、why引导的表语从句和that引导的定语从句等。总之,作者语言功底较好。

【完善建议】

1.第三段首句的It最好换成The Spring Festival,因为It离它所指代的首段中的the Spring Festival太远。

2.第三段中的“because I can buy...”可换成“because I can always buy...”,这样就突出了这是春节的风俗习惯。

(指导教师:金家军)

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