小屁孩日记

上课睡着了

Friday 周五

Well, today wasn't exactly my best day ever.

喏，准确来说，今天不是我过得最好的一天。

I fell asleep in sixth period today, and this time I was out COLD—Mr.Watson had to shake me to get me to wake up. As a punishment, I had to sit in the front of the room.

今天上第六节课的时候我睡着了，这一次我睡得不省人事，直到沃森先生把我摇醒。我受到的处罚是坐在教室前面。

That was just fine with me, because at least up there I could sleep in peace.

那正合我意，至少我在那里能睡个安稳觉。

I just wish someone woke me up when sixth period ended, because I didn't wake up until the NEXT period started.

我真希望第六节课下课后有人叫醒我，因为我一直到下一节课上课的时候才醒过来。

Key points

period 课时 be out cold不省人事；睡得昏沉 punishment惩罚

The class I woke up in was taught by Mrs. Lowry. Mrs. Lowry gave me detention, and on Monday I'm gonna have to stay after school to serve it.

我醒过来的时候是罗瑞太太的课。她罚我留堂。下星期一放学后我还得待在学校。

Monday 周一

I didn't really know what to expect from detention, but when I walked into the room, the first thought I had was, “I don't belong in here with these future criminals.”

我真的不知道罚留堂是怎么样的。走入那个房间，我第一个念头是：“我跟这些未来罪犯不一样，我不属于这里。”

I took the only empty seat, which was right in front of this kid named Leon Ricket.

我坐在最后一张空椅子上，刚好坐在一个名叫里昂·瑞奇特的小孩前面。

Leon is not the brightest kid in our school. He was in detention because of what he did when a wasp landed on the window in homeroom.

里昂不是我们学校最聪明的孩子。他被罚留堂，是因为在看到有只马蜂伏在教室的窗上之后，他做出的一个举动。

Key points

detention放学后留校 criminal罪犯 brightest最聪明的

wasp马蜂 homeroom学科教室

I found out that all you do in detention is to sit there and wait for it to be over. You're not allowed to read or do your homework or ANYTHING,which is a pretty dumb rule, considering that most of the kids in there could really use the extra study time.

我发现留堂的时候你要做的就是坐在那里，等待留堂时间结束。你不能读书或者做作业，什么事都不能做。这真是一个无聊的规定。这里的小孩本来可以利用这额外的时间学习。

Mr. Ray was the moderator, and he more or less kept an eye on us. But every time Mr. Ray looked away, Leon would flick my ear or give me a Wet Willie or something like that. Eventually Leon got careless, and Mr.Ray caught Leon with his finger in my ear.

雷先生负责看管我们，他或多或少监视着我们的举动。不过每次雷先生在看别的地方的时候，里昂就会弹一下我的耳朵，或者做舔湿手指插入我的耳朵之类的事。最后里昂一时大意，被雷先生看到他的手指插在我的耳朵里。

—知道了，雷先生。

Mr. Ray said if he caught Leon touching me again, he was gonna be in BIG trouble.

雷先生说要是他再看到里昂碰我一下，里昂的麻烦就大了。

Key points

dumb愚蠢的 moderator监管员 flick轻弹

give sb a Wet Willie指一种恶作剧，将手指弄湿再戳进别人耳朵里。

eventually最终 careless粗心大意的

—哎呦！

I knew Leon was just gonna go back to bugging me, so I decided to put a stop to it. As soon as Mr. Ray's back was turned, I slapped my hands together to make it seem like Leon hit me.

我知道里昂过不了一会又会来骚扰我，我打定主意要阻止他。雷先生的背一转过去，我就轻拍双掌一下，听起来就像是里昂在打我。

Mr. Ray turned around and told Leon he was gonna have to stay another half hour, and that he had detention again TOMORROW.

雷先生转过身来，对里昂宣布他要在这里多待半小时，而且明天他还得留堂。

On the way home, I was wondering if I made the smartest move back there at the school. I'm not exactly the fastest runner, and a half hour isn't that big of a head start.

回家路上，我一直在考虑我是不是做了有史以来在学校里最聪明的举动。我压根不是跑得最快的人，半小时的领先优势并不大。

The end 完 结

Key points

bug使恼怒 slap拍 head start领先

本栏目选自《小屁孩日记5 午餐零食大盗》（中英双语版），由新世纪出版社授权选载。