AnbriefanalysisofrhythmicaestheticsintheEnglishtranslationsofMoonlightoverthelotuspond

1. Introduction

Eugene A. Nida， a famous translation theorist once said： “The language of the generalized prose， like other forms of movement in the nature， is rhythmic.” The rhythmic aesthetics in prose are displayed through phonology and sentence patterns. Rhymes are not only the products of word formation， but also a tool for balance. With the rhymes similar to music and the harmonic tones， the prose is melodious and pleasing.

2. The rhythmic aesthetics in Moonlight over the lotus pond

Moonlight over the lotus pond is a successful aesthetic prose because its full of rhythms and beautiful tunes， as a lyric song singing from the bottom of heart. Hence it is very difficult for translators to reappear such function in the English version.

Take the last part of the first paragraph as an example：

妻在屋里拍著闰儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。我悄悄地披了大衫，带上门出去。

In this sentence， the repeated words“迷迷糊糊”，“悄悄”are used. It not only makes the sentence rhyme，but emphasizes the quietness in the room.

The translator， Zhu Cunshens version is： In the room my wife was patting the son， Run-er， sleepily humming a cradle song. Shrugging on an overcoat， quietly， I made my way out， closing the door behind me.

Mr. Zhu used present participle forms like “patting”， “humming”， ”shrugging” and ”closing” to express the quietness of the scene and the move of the hero， which are rhythmic and conform to the original “迷迷糊糊”， “悄悄”. The last participle phrases are appropriate and natural.

While the translator couple， Yang Xianyi and Gladys Yangs translation is： My wife was in the house patting Runer and humming a lullaby to him. I quietly slipped on a long gown， and walked out leaving the door on the latch.

This version is faithful to the original one. Its precise in sentence structure and accurate in expression， but not as rhythmic as the first version.

In another sentence of the second paragraph “荷塘四面，长着许多树，蓊蓊郁郁的”： Zhu Cunshen used “in a lush， shady ambience of trees all around the pond ”to express “which is more excellent as the sound produced by “sh” create a spooky and dark scene.

3. Conclusion

Rhyme makes language poetic and harmonious. This essay is just a brief analysis of the English translations of Moonlight over the lotus pond. It only touches the tip of the ice-berg， and the analysis is far from perfect， which leaves much room for further study.

References：

[1]毛荣贵，廖晟. 译彩纷呈[M].北京：中国对外翻译出版社，2005，1.

[2]潘卫民，毛荣贵.语言的音韵美及其翻译再现[J].中南大学学报（社会科学版），2006.2

[3]王育伦.翻译和音韵美[J].中国翻译，1983，12.

[4]夏立新.浅谈英汉翻译中的音韵和节奏美[J].天津外国语学院学报，2003，6.

[5]杨玉兰.论散文翻译中审美效果的艺术——以《荷塘月色》的英译为例[J].四川外语学报，2008，11.

【作者简介】欧渝，重庆公共运输职业学院人文艺术系英语教研室。