A Ray of Sunshine 一缕阳光

By+Vijaya+Khisty+Bodach

It was Ray who told me that I wasn't fat. She said， "You're not fat. You're tall and curvy. Rubenesque1）."

It was Ray who told me that I could do anything I wanted. She said， "You can be a scientist， an artist， or a designer."

It was Ray who told me to follow my heart. She said， "Know yourself."

I met Ray the year I started high school. Our class had settled down for algebra when there came a knock at the door.

"Come in，" said Mrs. Hatch， our teacher. A dark brown girl wearing a costume out of a foreign movie stepped into the room. She was very， very thin.

"I am sorry to be late. I got lost，" she said， dark eyes drinking in2） everything in our classroom.

"Please take a seat." Ray took the chair beside me. Chairs next to me were always empty. Nobody liked to sit by me. I was fat and unfashionable. I wore comfortable clothes that I had sewn myself.

"Please introduce yourselves，" said Mrs. Hatch. She looked at me to begin.

"Hi， I'm Katie，" I said. Mrs. Hatch nodded to Ray.

She stood up and said， "My name is Reshma， but you can call me Ray. I come from India. I am happy to be here， in this land of opportunity." Someone snorted.

Mrs. Hatch smiled and said， "You may sit down. In this country you do not have to stand up when you answer questions." Ray sat down and adjusted her flowing， swishing3）， silky clothes while the other kids introduced themselves.

Ray chose to sit with me during lunch. I had a juicy hamburger with fries. Ray had a bowl of vegetable soup. She said， "I only eat things that are renewable from animals — like milk and eggs. Once you eat the animal， poof —gone." The kids at the next table waved chicken drumsticks at her. Ray looked away from them. I didn't tell her that my hamburger was a dead cow. She'd figure it out eventually.

The next day， Ray brought strange-smelling food. I gasped from pain when I tasted it. "My mouth is on fire. My tongue is tingling. I'm sweating，" I howled. "I hate it." I gulped down4） a glass of milk.

Ray laughed and said， "My mouth is on fire. My tongue is tingling. I'm sweating." She smacked her lips. "I love it." She devoured5） puffy， white rice cakes called idlis6） and a spicy lentil stew called sambar7）. She ate raita8）—yogurt with shredded cucumbers. "If the idli-sambar is poison，" Ray said， "then raita is the antidote9）."

Ray was my antidote—my best friend. The poison I had built up inside myself about being fat began to fade.

Weeks later， on the school bus， Ray slumped in her seat and said， "I miss home."

"So， how did you end up living here？" I asked. I couldn't even imagine visiting a different country， away from all that I was used to.

"I came with my mother，" Ray said. "She is trying to discover how proteins fold into their final shape. They have to be folded just right to do their job." I understood. A piece of cloth is just that until you fold， cut， twist， and stitch it —to be a shirt， a skirt， or pants. Ray continued， "My mother's work will one day cure diseases like mad-cow disease."

"Wow！" I believed her.

"I'm going to study hard and be a doctor，" Ray said. "Then I'll return to India to help the street people." I knew she'd do it someday. "What will you do？" she asked me. "You must have goals."

"I want to be thin，" I said， thinking how popular I'd be.

"But what would that accomplish？" Ray asked. I wondered， too. Being stick-thin hadn't helped her. She was probably the least popular girl in the school. So I began to think about what I'd really like to do.

"I'm good at sewing. Maybe I will become a dress designer，" I said. That afternoon， we went to the library and studied books about design. Ray pulled down a huge book with the paintings of Peter Paul Rubens in it. The figures in the paintings were lush10） and beautiful. And for the first time， I felt beautiful， too.

Ray was here for a short time—just a year. But she changed my life. Now， when my mouth is on fire and my tongue is tingling and I sweat， I love it. I even learned to make idli-sambar and raita at home， because Ray won't be here to fix11） those dishes for me. Her mom got a job in England working on mad cows， so they moved away.

I'm still here. I'll never have the waif12） look —I'm sturdy and solid， like a good wooden fence. But I don't mind. I try to look at myself the way Ray saw me， tall and curvy. Rubenesque. After meeting Ray， who was like a ray of sunshine in my life， I know who I am. I'm a person who could be a scientist， an artist， or a designer. Right now， I'm making matching red dresses for Ray and me， and flannel13） pajamas just for Ray. She says she's freezing in England.

友情是一縷阳光洒下的温暖，照亮你的内心，陪你坚定前行。

是瑞告诉我我并不胖。她说：“你不胖。你长得高，还有曲线美，有如鲁本斯（编注：即后文的彼得·保罗·鲁本斯）画笔下红润迷人的女子。”

是瑞告诉我我可以做任何我想做的事。她说：“你可以成为一个科学家、一个艺术家或者一个设计师。”

是瑞告诉我我要听从自己内心的声音。她说：“你要了解你自己。”

我是在刚上高中那一年遇到瑞的。当时我们全班已经坐好准备上代数课了，突然传来了敲门声。

“请进。”我们的老师哈奇夫人说。一个深棕色皮肤的女孩走進了教室，她穿着一身外国电影里常见的那种衣服，非常非常瘦。

“不好意思我迟到了。我刚才迷路了。”她说道，乌黑的眼睛细细打量着教室里的一切。

“请坐。”瑞在我旁边的椅子上坐下。我旁边的椅子通常都是空的。没人愿意坐在我旁边。我又胖，打扮又不入时。我总是穿着自己做的舒服的衣服。

“请大家做一下自我介绍。”哈奇夫人说。她看着我示意我开始。

“大家好，我是凯蒂。”我说。哈奇夫人又朝着瑞点点头。

她站起来说：“我叫瑞希玛，大家可以叫我瑞。我来自印度。我很高兴来到这个到处是机遇的地方。”有人轻哼了一声。

哈奇夫人笑了笑，说：“你可以坐下说。在这个国家，回答问题的时候不必站起来。”瑞坐下，其他孩子做自我介绍时，她整理了自己那平滑的、窸窣作响的丝绸衣服。

午饭时瑞选择和我坐在一起。我吃的是肉汁丰富的汉堡配薯条。瑞吃了一碗蔬菜汤。她说：“我只吃动物生产的可再生的东西——像牛奶、鸡蛋之类的。一旦你吃了动物，噗——就什么都没了。”邻桌的孩子们冲着她挥了挥鸡腿。瑞转头不去看他们。我没跟她说我的汉堡来自一头死牛。不过她最后会知道的。

第二天，瑞带来了闻起来很奇怪的食物。我尝了一口，疼得直吸气。“我的嘴里着火了，我舌头发麻，我在冒汗。”我嗷嗷叫着。“我不喜欢这个东西。”我咕咚咕咚灌下一杯牛奶。

瑞大笑着说：“我的嘴里着火了，我舌头发麻，我在冒汗。”她吧唧一下嘴。“我喜欢这个东西。”她大口吃着叫豆米饼的松软白色米糕和叫做酸豆汤的辛辣炖豆子。她还吃黄瓜酸奶酱——拌有碎黄瓜的酸奶。“如果说豆米饼配酸豆汤是毒药，”瑞说，“那么黄瓜酸奶酱就是解药。”

瑞是我的解药——我最好的朋友。我内心深处因肥胖而生成的毒素开始逐渐消散。

几周之后，在校车上，瑞一屁股坐在座位上，说：“我想家了。”

“那么，你最终是怎么来这里生活的？”我问。我当时甚至无法想象去到另一个国家，远离所有自己习惯的东西。

“我是跟我妈妈一起来的。”瑞说。“她正在试图发现蛋白质是如何折叠成最后的形状的。它们必须用正确的方式折叠后才能发挥作用。”我明白她的意思。一块布料就只是一块布料，直到经过折叠、剪裁、搓捻和缝合，它才能成为一件上衣、一件裙子或是一条裤子。瑞继续说：“我妈妈的工作将来可以治好疯牛病这类的病。”

“哇！”我相信她说的话。

“我会好好学习，以后成为一名医生。”瑞说，“然后我要回到印度去帮助那些无家可归的人。”我知道她将来会这么做。“你以后要做什么？”她问我。“你肯定是有目标的。”

“我想要变瘦。”我说，想着自己会变得多么受欢迎。

“但是那有什么用呢？”瑞问道。我也很疑惑。瑞像麻秆一样瘦，但这并没有帮到她。她可能是学校里最不受欢迎的女生。于是我开始思考自己真正想要做的事。

“我擅长缝纫。也许我会成为一名服装设计师。”我说。那天下午，我们一起去了图书馆，读了一些关于设计的书。瑞从书架上拉下来一本超大的书，里面有彼得·保罗·鲁本斯的画。画里的人物都漂亮且有魅力。这是我第一次觉得自己其实也很美。

瑞在这里待了很短一段时间——只有一年。但是她改变了我的人生。现在，当我的嘴里感觉着火了，舌头发麻，我在冒汗时，我已经爱上这种感觉了。我甚至学会了在家做豆米饼配酸豆汤，还有黄瓜酸奶酱，因为瑞不在这里，没有人为我做这些菜。她妈妈在英格兰找到一份研究疯牛病的工作，所以她们搬走了。

我还在这里。我永远都不会有流浪儿一样的外表——我强壮、结实，就像牢固的木篱笆。但是我不介意。我试着用瑞看我的方式看待自己：个子高，有曲线美，有如鲁本斯画笔下红润迷人的女子。在遇到瑞之后，她就像我生命里的一缕阳光，让我知道了自己是谁。我是个可能会成为科学家、艺术家或设计师的人。眼下，我在为我和瑞做闺蜜装红裙子，并且为瑞做一套法兰绒睡衣。她说她在英格兰冻坏了。

1. Rubenesque [?ru?b??nesk] adj. （女子）红润迷人的；有如鲁本斯画笔下的女性

2. drink in： 陶醉于；欣赏；被……强烈地吸引住

3. swish [sw??] vi. （丝绸衣裙等）作声；发唰唰（或嗖嗖等）声音

4. gulp down： 狼吞虎咽地吃；大口大口地吞下

5. devour [d??va??（r）] vt. 狼吞虎咽地吃

6. idlis [??dli?] n. <泰米尔语> （印度南部的）豆米饼

7. sambar [?sɑ?mbɑ?（r）] n. <泰米尔语> （印度）浓味扁豆汤

8. raita[?ra?t?] n. 黄瓜酸奶酱，印度的一道菜，将切碎的黄瓜、胡椒粉、薄荷等放进酸奶中并与咖喱同食

9. antidote [??ntid??t] n. 解毒药

10. lush [l??] adj. （外表、味道或者气味）吸引人的

11. fix [f?ks] vt. 安排，供给；准备（饭食等），沏（茶）

12. waif [we?f] n. 流浪汉，无家可归者，（尤指）流浪儿

13. flannel [?fl?nl] n. 法兰绒