搞笑，我们是认真的！

郭宇

你知道石头也有性格吗？你知道什么是“伪深刻废话”吗？你知道像山羊一样生活是一种怎样的体验吗？上述问题如果都能勾起你的好奇心，不妨一起来回顾今年的搞笑诺贝尔奖，看看科学家们是怎样用搞笑的方式来认真地搞科研。Investigations into rats wearing pants， the personalities of rocks and the truthfulness of 1，000 liars won Ig Nobel prizes on Thursday night at Harvard， where Nobel-winning scientists gathered to honor the strangest research of the year.

The ceremony， now in its 26th year， delivered a $10tn Zimbabwean bill （about 40 cents in US money） to winners. Those who traveled to Boston received their prizes from Nobel laureates： chemist Dudley Herschbach1）， economist Eric Maskin2）， Dr. Richard Roberts3） and physicist Roy Glauber4）.

As in past years， the tone of the awards show vacillated5） from gleeful absurdism to satire to genuine wonder at the lengths to which scientists will let their curiosity lead them.

研究穿着裤子的老鼠、探究石头的性格、发现1000个撒谎者的真话等课题赢得了周四晚（编注：英文原文发表于2016年9月23日）在哈佛大学颁发的搞笑诺贝尔奖。在这里，几位获得过诺贝尔奖的科学家齐聚一堂，为本年度最古怪的科学研究颁奖。

今年的搞笑诺贝尔奖颁奖典礼是第26届，典礼向获奖者颁发了一张面值高达十万亿津巴布韦元的纸币（约合40美分）。获奖者们前往波士顿，从诺贝尔奖得主手中接过奖品，这些诺奖得主分别是：化学家达德利·赫施巴赫、经济学家埃里克·马斯金、医学家理查德·罗伯茨和物理学家罗伊·格劳伯。

在过去的几年里，搞笑诺贝尔奖的基调不断摇摆，有时荒诞好笑，有时又充满讽刺意味，有时又为科学家们愿意在好奇心的驱使下长期研究这些问题而由衷惊叹。

Reproduction Prize 生殖学奖

Egyptian urologist6） Ahmed Shafik wanted to know the toll that trousers might take on male rats. He made murine7） trousers—covering the animals hind legs with a hole for the tail—in various cloths： 100% polyester8）， 50/50% polyester/cotton， all cotton and all wool.

Rats that wore polyester showed “significantly lower” rates of sexual activity， Shafik found， perhaps because of the electrostatic charges created by the material. Cotton- and wool-wearing rats were relatively normal.

Economics Prize 经济学奖

Mark Avis， Sarah Forbes and Shelagh Ferguson， a team from New Zealand and the UK， won the prize in economics for a study of the personalities of rocks. The trio studied a concept called “brand personality9），” or the “set of human characteristics associated with the brand”—for example wholesomeness， youth， intelligence and sophistication—by putting pictures of rocks in front of 225 Kiwi10） students.

The students then decided which of 42 traits， 15 facets and five factors to apply to the rocks in question. One， Rock G， was variously described as “a big New York type businessman， rich， smooth， maybe a little shady11）” and “carries a black brief case， slick hair， quick thinker and quicker talker. Not a good dude though.”

Rock I was described by one student as “a gypsy or a traveller， a hippie” and by another as “liberal， attractive and female， I saw a young person， maybe mid-30s， who was very attractive when she was younger/possibly a model. Has her own way of thinking， with a somewhat grounded confidence， enjoys organic food.”

埃及泌尿科专家艾哈迈德·沙菲克想知道穿裤子会给公鼠带来哪些不良影响，于是制作了一些适合老鼠穿的裤子。这些裤子可以遮住老鼠的后腿，并给尾巴留了一个小孔，其面料各不相同：有100%涤纶的、50/50%涤棉的、纯棉的和纯羊毛的。

沙菲克发现，穿涤纶裤子的老鼠表现出了“明显更低的”性行为频率，这或许是由涤纶材料产生的静电荷所致。穿着棉质和羊毛裤子的老鼠们则表现得相对正常。

来自新西兰和英国的马克·阿维斯、萨拉·福布斯和希拉·弗格森组成的三人小组因有关石头性格的研究获得了经济学奖。三人向225名新西兰学生展示了一些石头的照片，以此来研究被称为“品牌个性”的概念，即“与特定品牌相关的人类特性”，如健康、年轻、智慧、老练等。

然后，学生们需要断定这些石头符合42种特质、15个方面和五种要素中的哪几种。其中，石头G被分别描述为“一个典型的大块头纽约商人，富有，圆滑，或许名声有点不好”“带着一个黑色公文包，油头粉面，思维敏捷，语速极快，但总之不像个好人”。

石头I被一位学生描述为“一个吉普赛人，或是一个旅行者，一个嬉皮士”，而另一位学生则称它是“自由且有魅力的女性，我看到了一个青年女子，或许三十四五岁，年轻的时候很美，可能还做过模特。她有独立的思想，不盲目自信，喜爱有机食品”。

石头G和石头I

1. Dudley Herschbach：达德利·赫施巴赫（1932～），美国物理化学家，1986年诺贝尔化学奖获得者

2. Eric Maskin：埃里克·马斯金（1950～），美国经济学家，2007年诺贝尔经济学奖获得者

3. Richard Roberts：理查德·罗伯茨（1943～），英国生物化学家和分子生物学家，1993年诺贝尔生理学或医学奖的获得者

4. Roy Glauber：罗伊·格劳伯（1925～），美国物理学家，2005年诺贝尔物理学奖获得者

5. vacillate [?v?s?le?t] vi. 摇摆；波动

6. urologist [ju?r?l?d?ist] n. [医]泌尿科医师；泌尿科专家

7. murine [?mj??ra?n] adj. [动]鼠的；鼠科的

8. polyester [?p?li?est?（r）] n. 聚酯纤维，涤纶

9. brand personality：品牌个性，即当人们看到某一品牌名称时感受、联想到的人类特性，包括真诚、刺激、胜任、教养和强壮这五个核心维度，往下细分为15个方面和42种特质。比如保时捷就会让人觉得“刺激”。

10. Kiwi [?ki?wi?] n. 新西兰人

11. shady [??e?di] adj. 名声不好的；不老实的

12. prosthetic [pr?s?θet?k] adj. [医]假体的

13. den [den] n. 洞穴

14. sniff out：发现，找到

15. scavenge [?sk?v?nd?] vi. （在垃圾废物中）找（食物或有用之物）

16. bleat [bli?t] vi. （羊）咩咩叫

17. gibberish [?d??b?r??] n. 莫名其妙的话

18. frame [fre?m] vt. 说出；讲出；表达

19. office drone：通常指那些每天从事单调乏味工作的办公室白领。

20. paranormal [?p?r??n??（r）m（?）l] adj. 不符合科学法则的；超自然的

21. skewed [skju?d] adj. 歪曲的；偏的

Biology Prize 生物学奖

The biology award went to two Britons： Thomas Thwaites， who created prosthetic12） limbs that let him move like and among goats， and Charles Foster， who has tried to live as a badger， an otter， a fox and a stag.

As a badger， Foster ate worms， dug a hillside den13） and tried to sniff out14） voles. Living as an urban fox， he scavenged15） through trash and slept in gardens. As a goat， Thwaites infiltrated a herd in the Swiss Alps and spent three days eating grass， bleating16） and stumbling over rocks.

Foster and Thwaites wrote books about their experiments， respectively Being a Beast and GoatMan.

Peace Prize 和平奖

The peace prize went to a gang of philosophers from Canada and the US who published a paper titled On the Reception and Detection of Pseudo-Profound Bullshit.

The researchers studied how people understand gibberish17） that has been framed18） as if it means something， by creating random but grammatical sentences of buzzwords that sounded like vaguely meditative posters meant to inspire office drones19） or distract dental patients from the drill. Examples included “wholeness quiets infinite phenomena” and “hidden meaning transforms unparalleled abstract beauty.”

“There is little question that bullshit is a real and consequential phenomenon，” the scientists wrote， warning that given advances in communication， “bullshit may be more pervasive than ever before.”

Their mission： “Are people able to detect blatant bullshit？ Who is most likely to fall prey to bullshit and why？”

The philosophers asked 280 students at the University of Waterloo to rate the “profoundness” of real and invented statements on a scale of one to five， and to search for meaning in those statements. Those students most “receptive to bullshit，” they found， were “less reflective， lower in cognitive ability” and more likely “to hold religious and paranormal20） beliefs.”

思韦茨扮作山羊

生物学奖被授予了两名英国人：托马斯·思韦茨和查尔斯·福斯特。前者发明了假肢，使他能像山羊那样走动，混迹于羊群；后者则尝试着像獾、水獭、狐狸和牡鹿一样生活。

作为獾时，福斯特吃虫子，在山坡上挖掘巢穴，并尝试找到田鼠。作为一只生活在城市里的狐狸，他在垃圾堆里找寻食物，并在公园露宿。化身山羊的思韦茨则在瑞士的阿尔卑斯山区混入了一个羊群，和羊群生活了三天，一起吃草、咩咩叫，还会被岩石绊倒。

福斯特和思韦茨把他们的试验写成了书，书名分别为《作为野兽》和《山羊人》。

和平奖授予给了几位来自加拿大和美国的哲学家，他们发表了一篇题为《关于伪深刻废话的接受和识别》的论文。

研究人员编造了一些由时髦词汇构成、随机组合但符合语法规则的句子。这些句子听上去像一些意味深沉、意在激励那些从事乏味工作的办公室白领或是分散牙科手术病人注意力的海报标语。利用这些句子，他们研究人们是如何理解貌似有意义的废话。这样的句子包括“完整让无限的现象安静下来”和“隐含的意义改造了无与伦比的抽象美”。

“毫无疑问，讲废话是一个真实且重要的现象，”科学家们写道，并警告说，考虑到通讯的进步，“废话可能比史上任何时期都要普遍。”

他们的任务是要研究：“人们能否察觉毫无掩饰的废话？哪些人最有可能被废话所俘获？为什么？”

这些哲学家在滑铁卢大学找到280名学生，让他们阅读一些真实的和虚构的声明，然后按照1～5的等级对这些声明的“深刻性”进行评级，并找出这些声明的含义。研究发现，那些最容易“接受废话”的学生“思索相对较少，认知能力也较低”，且更有可能“怀有宗教和超自然信仰”。

《作为野兽》的封面

Psychology Prize 心理学奖

A coalition from the US， Canada， Germany， Belgium and the Netherlands won the psychology award， for asking 1，000 liars how often they had lied over the course of their life， and rating how well they lied.

People gradually lied more as they aged out of childhood， the study found， peaking during adolescence， and as adults lied on average twice a day. Lying decreased with age， although some prolific liars may have skewed21） results. The researchers also acknowledged that the liars might have been lying to them all along.

一个来自美国、加拿大、德国、比利时和荷兰的团队获得了心理学奖，他们的课题是询问1000名说谎者他们在一生中说谎的频率，并评估他们说谎的水平。

该研究发现，随着逐渐走出童年，人们撒的谎越来越多，在青春期时达到顶峰，到成年时平均一天说两次谎。此后随着年龄增长，说谎的频率逐年下降，但也有一些人是经常说谎，针对他们的研究结果可能偏离了实际情况。研究人员同时承认，一些说谎者可能一直在调查中说谎。

Physics Prize 物理学奖

Physics awards were given to researchers from Hungary， Spain， Sweden and Switzerland， who found that white horses attract fewer horseflies and that dragonflies are fatally attracted to black tombstones.

物理学奖被授予了来自匈牙利、西班牙、瑞典和瑞士的研究人员，他们发现白色的马不怎么吸引马蝇，而蜻蜓特别喜欢黑色的墓碑。

Medicine Prize 医学奖

A medicine prize was given to German scientists who found that if you have an itch on your left side， you can look into a mirror and scratch your right to relieve it.

医学奖被授予了几位德国科学家，他们发现，如果你的身体左侧瘙痒，可以通过照镜子并挠身体右侧来止痒。

Chemistry Prize 化学奖

The most surprising winner was for chemistry： The automaker Volkswagen， caught for violating US emissions law， was granted a nearly worthless Zimbabwean bill to help pay for its massive legal costs. The Ig Nobel committee said the award was “for solving the problem of excessive automobile pollution emissions by automatically， electro-mechanically producing fewer emissions whenever the cars are being tested.”

最令人惊讶的获奖者是化学奖得主——大众汽车公司，该公司被发现违反了美国的尾气排放法，因此被授予一张几乎毫无价值的津巴布韦纸币，用以帮助其支付巨额的诉讼费用。搞笑诺贝尔奖委员会称，授予大众公司这个奖项是为了表彰它“在汽车接受检测时，通过自动化和机电化的手段释放更少的排放物，由此解决了机动车排放污染过量的问题”。