八种方式重拾旧日友情

8 Best First Moves to

Get Your Friends

Back in Your Life

When we get super-busy， some friendships fall by the wayside. But that doesnt mean you cant revive the relationship. Even if a lot of time has elapsed， its worth saving those nurturing friends who know you deep down and whom you can confide in and call in a crisis. Wanting to rekindle a friendship isnt enough， though. You have to find a way to reconnect， which can be difficult after months or years of sporadic- or zero-contact. Here are the best first moves to make to get your friend back in your life.当我们的生活越来越忙碌，一些友情就渐渐变淡了，但那并不代表友情就此终结。即使已很久没有联系，也要留住那些真正和你心灵相通、关键时刻值得信赖、危险时刻一呼必应的益友。然而让友情之火重燃，光想不做可没用。在几个月或几年不联系或彼此都已疏远的情况下，你不得不找出一个重新联系的方法。以下的几点小建议，可以让你的老朋友重新回到你的生活中。

An activity that you used to do together can rev up a stalled friendship. Since that drew you together in the past， it should reignite positive memories and bring you closer again. Start by emailing your friend with a list of shared favorite activities and suggest doing one of those. Anything from going shopping to visiting that coffee shop you both love can rebuild your bond.

通过重温曾经一起做过的事可以很好地重塑友情。既然过往的经历使你们在一起，那么它也应该会重燃你们美好的回忆，并因此让你们变得更为亲密。先给你的老朋友写一封电子邮件，列上一串曾经最爱一起做的事，并建议重做其中一件。无论是外出购物或是去你们都喜欢的咖啡馆小坐，都可以重建你们的关系。

Reconnect over a Favorite Pastime  找回旧日共处时光

Write Her a Facebook Message  去对方的社交网络页面上留言

Getting in touch electronically is one of the easiest ways to catch up in network time. But what do you say in that first note？ Start with some information about how busy youve been and then add in details about what youve been doing. Sharing updates about your life can encourage your friend to reply with the same openness. Once youve reconnected， you may make plans to see each other in person. You cant substitute Facebook or other forms of social media for real relationships.

网络时代，用电子方式联络是最简单的方式之一。不过第一句你要说什么呢？先可以说说自己最近很忙，并具体说说自己到底在忙些啥。主动分享你自己的生活能鼓励你的朋友也反馈同样的信息。一旦你们重新联络上，可计划一下约出来互相见个面。毕竟社交网络上的交情并不能代表真正的感情。

Send a Handwritten Card  寄张手写卡

A note in the mail can be a welcome surprise for a friend you havent spoken to in a while. And theres no need to wait until a holiday for an excuse to send it; a “just because” card can restart your relationship anytime. Women are busy and dont want to feel that the friendship comes with too many strings attached. So avoid mentioning the past or specific dates when youre available to meet up. Instead， leave the message open-ended， explaining that youre available for lunch or drinks in the next couple of weeks. And remind her of the best way to contact you.

对许久不联系的朋友来说，一封突如其来的信绝对是个惊喜。并且你不用等到假期才去寄它，因为一张“正因为”问候卡能随时重新开始你们的关系。女人很忙，她们不喜欢太多附加条件的友情。因此不要在卡片里提太多过去或什么时候可以见面等具体事项，相反地，把信息留得开放些，提出自己未来几周都有空，出来吃顿饭或者喝杯咖啡都没问题，并顺便附上自己的联系方式。

Set a Phone Date  找时间煲电话粥

Hearing a friends voice can be a great way to reconnect. But with hectic schedules， you may wind up playing phone tag for a while before you catch each other. Thats why its best to schedule a chat. Leave a voicemail with times youre available. It may feel weird to call out of the blue， but people understand. Once youve got your friend on the phone， be sure to set up time for another phone date or an in-person meeting.

倾听老友的声音会是极赞的重联方式。不过人人都有自己的安排，在你们彼此联系上之前电话畅聊也许需要点运气。这就是为什么建议你先预约一次“电话聊天”的时间。留一条语音信息，告知你什么时候有空。你可能会觉得没头没脑突然邀约挺奇怪的，但人们一般都能够理解。一旦你和朋友的电话通了，赶紧约另一次煲电话粥的时间，或者面对面聊天也行。

Do Something Unexpected and Kind  做件出其不意又充满温情的事

Whether its sending a handmade present or her favorite type of cookies， preparing a small surprise can go a long way in rekindling a friendship， especially with someone you once considered a good pal. This will open your friends heart to you， which will further the friendship. Just dont go overboard with a nice gesture， for instance， showing up at your buddys doorstep... Mailing something affordable is your best choice.

无论是送一件手工制作的礼物还是送对方最喜欢的点心，准备一个小小的惊喜能大大地帮助你们重燃友情之火。这招对那种曾经是你死党的人来讲，尤其有用。它会让你的朋友打开心扉，从而和你继续这份友情。只是别做得太过火就行，比如，突然出现在你朋友的家门口之类的……寄一个不太贵重的小礼物是最好的选择。

Throw a Dinner Party  办一次晚宴派对

Chances are theres more than one friend youve been meaning to catch up with， so inviting over a group can restart multiple friendships at once. Let your buddies know how much they mean to you with a gratitude dinner. Youd better invite people who all know each other， such as a few former coworkers， to simplify planning and keep the dinner conversation flowing.

有可能你想保持联系的老友不止一个，所以不如把他们都请到家里来。举办一次感恩晚餐，让你的朋友们知道他们对你来说是多么重要。最好邀请那些互相都认识的人，比如前同事之类的，这样可以简化准备计划，聚餐时的谈话也能滔滔不绝。

Invite Friends along to an Event  邀请朋友一起参加活动

Have an extra ticket to a concert， party or book reading？ Bringing your friend to a gathering can be more casual and less intimidating than meeting one on one. This takes the pressure off and lets both of you relax in a group environment. Rather than jumping into a serious discussion of why you drifted apart， youll be socializing with other people or enjoying some entertainment， which can make your reunion less awkward.

手头有演唱会、派对或读书会多余的票吗？带朋友去参加活动，这会比单独相约见面要更轻松愉快。这样能卸下你们身上的包袱，让你们彻底放松在团体的氛围中。与其突然跳到“当初我为什么疏远你”之类的严肃话题，还不如跟大伙一起出去玩，一起享受娱乐，这能让你们的重聚少一些尴尬的气氛。

Try out a New Experience  一起尝试新经历

Creating fun memories together is a sure way to rekindle a friendship. Email your friend about meeting up and suggest a list of activities youve been meaning to try for your get-together， such as playing paintball， going rock climbing， taking dance lessons and going trekking. This is a great way to learn new things about your friend and find fresh commonalities to bond over.

一起制造欢乐回忆，绝对可以让你们重燃友情之火。给你朋友写一封电子邮件，提议一起去试试最近流行的新鲜玩意儿，比如彩弹实战、攀岩、舞蹈课、负重徒步。这是一个了解你朋友新的一面，并让你们再度找到相通之处的极好方法。