高考书面表达的四维提升——词、句、段、篇

庞群

书面表达旨在考查学生的英语写作能力，评价其能否运用相关常识和语言知识进行有效的文字表达，完成特定的交际任务。高考英语书面表达评分原则明确规定，“评分时应注意的主要内容为：内容要点、应用词汇和语法结构的丰富性和准确性及上下文的连贯性”。因此，除了注重词句表达是否丰富、准确外，内容完整、逻辑连贯、结构清晰也是极为重要的方面。书面表达的提升应是多维度的，只有词、句、段、篇秀其外慧其中的文章才能赢得阅卷老师的青睐。

词——准确亮眼

在高考书面表达评分原则中，“应用词汇的丰富性与准确性”是评分时应注意的主要内容之一，丰富多样、地道准确的词汇或短语能够为文章增色不少。

词汇替换

1. I like reading while my sister likes watching TV series.

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2. Today many young students dream of becoming famous online.

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3. I think reading is very good for us.

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4. I really hope that you can consider my suggestions.

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5. Would you please help me to turn down the radio？

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6. He refused to listen to his father.

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7. A new library is being built in our school.

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8. Your efforts will be very important.

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9. It is more and more important to receive a good education nowadays.

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10. The lives of Chinese people have increased steadily in the past twenty years.

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点石成金

1. 用丰富的亮点词汇替换掉普通词汇能提升文章的档次，但这要以准确、得体为前提。熟悉亮点词汇使用的语境才能保证表达的自然、流畅。

2. 在日常的学习中，我们要注重亮点词汇的积累，将以上表格不断丰富和延伸，并坚持训练替换思维。只有通过不断地运用、总结，我们在临场发挥时才能避免生搬硬套，做到运用自如。

句——自然高级

高考书面表达评分原则中对第五档作文有“应用了较多的语法结构”这一要求，这些复杂多样的结构的正确运用，可以增加文章语言的层次感，使文章丰富多彩，更好地展现作者的语言运用能力。这些高级句式主要是指定语从句、状语从句、名词性从句、非谓语动词、强调句、倒装句等。

句式改写

1. I dont know what to do next， so I am writing to ask for your advice. （现在分词作状语）

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2. Because I am worried about the time available， I made a detailed list of what to do that day. （過去分词作状语）

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3. As the final term is drawing near， all the students are occupied with their revision. （with复合结构）

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4. The theme of the show is environmental protection. It is of great importance in todays society. （定语从句）

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5. His willing heart to help others impressed me most. （名词性从句）

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6. Not the grades but your attitude counts. （强调句）

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7. We can achieve success only in this way. （倒装句）

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8. I passed the physics exam because of your help. （虚拟语气）

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9. Today， we use computers not only in our work but in our everyday life as well. （主动改被动）

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10. However， measures should be taken to deal with this. （插入语）

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点石成金

1. 高级句式的使用要以自然、流畅为前提，生搬硬套的高级句式读起来反而别扭，也会降低阅卷老师的好感。因此，在平常的学习中要经常进行高级句式應用与替换的思维训练。

2. 避免过度使用长难句，应长短句交错，主动、被动交错，或增加插入语，使文章抑扬顿挫。

段——丰富连贯

评分原则中的“内容要点的丰富性”要求学生在完成试题规定的任务之外对内容要点增加适当的细节，使文章更丰富。评分原则中的“上下文的连贯性”，以及在对第五档作文要求中的“有效地使用了语句间的连接成分”，明确规定了要使用恰当的衔接词句以增加文章的逻辑连贯性。

段落加工

（2020年全国乙卷书面表达）你校正在组织英语作文比赛。请以身边值得尊敬和爱戴的人为题，写一篇短文参赛，内容包括：

1. 人物简介;

2. 尊敬和爱戴的原因。

注意：

1. 词数100左右;

2. 短文题目和首句已为你写好。

学生习作第二段：

My father is warm?hearted and always willing to help others. He is also very hardworking and shoulders the responsibility of supporting the whole family. But he never shows any sign of depression or impatience. He is always energetic and optimistic， encouraging us to adopt a positive attitude towards life.

加工后：___________________________________________________________________________

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点石成金

1. 适当增加细节能使文章内容更丰富，但细节的添加需围绕要点，且不宜在某个要点上添加过多，适当、均匀地添加细节才能保持段落结构的合理、均匀。

2. 除了衔接词和短语，恰当的主题句与过渡句也能使段落逻辑更连贯。

篇——完整清晰

高考书面表達评分原则中对第五档作文的要求有“覆盖所有内容要点”和“全文结构紧凑”，这就要求考生认真审题，所写文章应包含所有要点，使内容完整。同时文章的结构应清晰、紧凑，一般以三段式“总—分—总”为宜：

Heading：点题;一两个句子，开门见山（书信一般为写信目的）。

Body：中心记述部分;层次分明。

Ending：小结;呼应主题（书信一般为表达愿望等）。

篇章升华

假定你是李华，你的一位美国朋友Peter想来中国旅行，他写信给你想了解到北京后乘坐何种交通工具旅行比较适宜。请你给他写一封回信，建议他乘坐高铁（CRH/China Railway High?speed）。

理由：1. 便捷、准点;2. 舒适、安全;3. 购票方便、价格适宜。

学生习作：

Dear Peter，

Im expecting you to come to China. To answer your question about the best transport in Beijing， Im writing to provide my advice. I think China Railway High?speed is the best means of transportation. We all like it because its safe and always arrives on time. It has a great many different lines and can reach every province， so it is very convenient. And it also has very good service. You can buy the ticket easily and conveniently and the price is not that expensive！ CRH makes our life better and is outstanding in the world. I believe that you will be satisfied with it.

Yours，

Li Hua

请从高级词汇、丰富句式、段内衔接与篇章结构四个维度对该作文进行升华。

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点石成金

虽然本文按“词—句—段—篇”的顺序分析了书面表达四个维度的提升方法，但实际的写作应是从宏观到微观的过程，先构思篇章布局，后确定段落层次，再加入亮点句式，最后换用高级词汇。因此，高考书面表达的完成过程应按以下步骤：

1. 认真审题，要点完整;

2. 谋篇布局，结构清晰;

3. 增加细节，衔接连贯;

4. 丰富句式，表达自然;

5. 高级词汇，运用准确。