YOU’VE GOT QUESTIONS? SHE’S GOT ANSWERS

My wife and I have been separated for two years， but a new law will require us to go through a 冷静期 （l0ngj#ngq～， cool-off period） before we can divorce. What should I do？

George Li

How dare you！ You 渣男 （zh`n1n， scumbag）！ Havent you heard？ 宁拆一座庙， 不毁一桩婚 （N#ngch`i y！ zu7 mi3o， b&hu@ y# zhu`ngh$n. Its better to destroy a temple than to break up a marriage）. Those 好心 （h2ox～n， kindhearted） people at the 民政局 （m！nzh-ngj%， civil affairs bureau） clearly dont want to 棒打鸳鸯 （b3ng d2 yu`ny`ng， “drive apart a pair of Mandarin ducks with a stick，” separate a couple）. No outsider will support you on this matter， since they always say， 劝和不劝离 （qu3n h9 b% qu3n l！， better to stay together than to split）. I stuck with my drunken gambling husband， didnt I？ Id have left him long ago， but the 居委會 （j$w0ihu#， residential committee） people kept asking me to consider my children…oh， wait…I see what you mean. How long is this cool-off period， you say？ I think I have some papers to file.

Is it safe to eat salmon now that Covid-19 has been found in a Beijing seafood market？ I really miss sashimi.

Hungry Huang

What a stupid fad， to eat raw fish in the first place！ Are you a 原始人 （yu1nsh@r9n， caveman）？ Why the habit of 茹毛饮血 （r%m1o-y@nxu-， eating raw flesh and drinking blood）？ Whoever invented sashimi， and salad for that matter， must be a 懒惰的 （l2ndu7 de， lazy） cook： toss a bunch of ingredients on a plate and say its done. In China， a very 文明的 （w9nm！ng de， civilized） country， we always cook our food， and drink 开水 （k`ishu@， boiled water）， since its good for our health. Listen to the ancient 智慧 （zh#hu#， wisdom） of our ancestors. If you must have salmon， cook the damn fish before putting it in your mouth.

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