网络欺凌：少年网民的烦恼

欺凌（bullying）存在已久。然而來到网络时代，欺凌又“进化”到一个新阶段——网络欺凌（cyberbullying）。网络欺凌是指人们利用互联网做出针对个人或群体的，恶意、重复、敌意的伤害行为，致使其他人受到伤害。对于热衷用社交网络交流沟通的青少年来说，网络欺凌的危害性更大。如果你或你的朋友曾经受到网络欺凌，请不要害怕，更不能有伤害自己的念头。你要记住，还有很多人和你站在同一阵线。让我们一起对网络欺凌say no！

“I was like， ‘How can I make this all stop？ How can I make this all go away，” Rachel Lemmons asked herself at a tipping point when high school bullying became more than she could handle.

“The only thing I could think about was killing myself and just taking my own self out of the situation. That would just be the easiest thing I could do.”

With social media， the main platform for communication among young Americans， taunting is no longer limited to school hours and can spread beyond the classroom. The potential for emotional damage to the victim is huge， especially for young girls， who are more likely to experience cyberbullying than boys， according to a study recently published in School Psychology Quarterly.

Psychologist Judith Margerum said if you got bullied before the computer age， “you went home， and there was no Internet. You were home and everything was good and you were safe there.”

But now， Margerum explained，“Its not just isolated to the school anymore. Its out. Its in your entire life， and theres nowhere to get away from it.”

Forty-three percent of teens have been victims of cyberbullying， according to research by the National Crime Prevention Council （NCPC）. Almost 20 percent of teens have had a cyberbully pretend to be someone else in order to trick them online. And the results can be unbearable for victims.

“Horrible Mean Things”

Before her junior year in high school， Rachel Lemmons had everything going for her—excellent grades in school， supportive family， nice friends， and a caring boyfriend. But after a breakup with her boyfriend over the summer， all that changed. Her ex-boyfriends new girlfriend started some serious cyberbullying against her.

It started with prank text messages and then led to social media sites like Twitter.

“She made the Twitter account under her name， but then made it seem like I was the one Tweeting things off of the account and they were really horrible mean things，”Lemmons said. Then her peers began to turn against her as well.

“They were like，‘we all know that its you， Rachel. You need to stop.” Lemmons recalled being faced with threats from her classmates. “‘Were going to jump you. Were going to beat you up.”

These experiences are especially difficult for adolescents as friends become more important， Margerum explained.“When you get into adolescence， you compare yourself to your peer group and you look to your peer group to kind of see， do you fit in.”

“If your peer group starts to attack you，”Margerum says， “then youre going to start feeling bad about yourself， and thats going to impact your mood. So theres likely going to be depression.”

Some signs of bullying include： mood change， isolating oneself， distance from friends， and lack of interest in going to school.

Lemmons， whose grades were slipping， said she felt the latter. But， because of social media， skipping out didnt relieve her of the trouble. In her absence， her peers would tweet things like， “‘Hey， did you guys notice that the school smelled so much better today since Rachel wasnt there？” Lemmons said. Some of those Tweets were retweeted up to 50 times， spreading the hate to a much larger audience than the classroom.

“Dad Would Be Disappointed”

Such embarrassment pushed Lemmons to have suicidal thoughts. In general， youth bullied by their peers are more than twice as likely to report suicidal thoughts and more than three times more likely to report a suicide attempt， according to a study in the Journal of Pediatrics.

But despite having suicidal thoughts， Lemmons said the thought of hurting her family was a major deterrent. “I knew that if I were to kill myself， my dad would be so disappointed in me. And I just didnt want them to feel like that.”

For adolescents to overcome the emotional pain of bullying， they must regain feelings of self-worth. Margerum said bullying victims need to know that they do have power.

“Just because someone is bullying you， it doesnt make you a different person， it doesnt make you less worthwhile.”

“我當时想：‘我怎样才能让这一切停止？我怎样才能让这一切消失？”在面对高中里的欺凌现象已经束手无策时，接近临界点的雷切尔·莱蒙斯这样问自己。

“我能想到的唯一方法就是自杀，让自己得到解脱。那是我能采取的最简单的做法。”

随着社交媒体成为美国青少年交流的主要平台，同学之间的风言风语已经不再局限于在校时段，而是扩散到了教室以外的地方。最近发表在《学校心理学季刊》的一项研究表明，受欺凌者可能受到巨大的情感伤害，尤其是年轻女孩，她们比男生更可能受到网络欺凌。

心理学家朱迪思·玛格伦姆说，在电脑时代以前，要是受到欺负，“你回到家里，那里并没有互联网。你在家里安然无恙，十分安全。”

玛格伦姆接着解释道，但是现在，“欺凌现象已不再局限于学校，也出现在校外。它遍及你的整个生活，令你无处可逃。”

（美国）全国预防犯罪委员会（NCPC）的研究显示，有43%的青少年曾经是网络欺凌的受害者，另有近20%曾遇到过有人假扮身份在网上对他们进行恶作剧的情况。对受害者而言，结果也许是无法承受的。

“可怕而龌龊的事”

在11年级之前，雷切尔·莱蒙斯的生活一帆风顺——优异的学习成绩、非常支持她的家人、要好的朋友和一个对她呵护有加的男友。但自从夏天与男友分手后，一切都变了。她前男友的新女友开始在网上对她大肆进攻。

一开始只是恶作剧式的短信，后来发展到推特网之类的社交媒体网站上。

“她用她的名字注冊了推特账户，然后让它看起来好像是我在推送这个账户的消息，而那都是一些可怕而龌龊的东西。”莱蒙斯说。随后，她的同伴们开始与她为敌。

“他们说：‘雷切尔，我们都知道那个人就是你。你停手吧。”在回忆起同学们的威胁时，雷切尔这样说道。“‘我们会袭击你，我们要揍你一顿。”

玛格伦姆解释道，这些经历对青少年而言尤其难受，因为在这个年纪，朋友变得越来越重要。“进入青春期后，你会拿自己与同龄群体做比较，看自己是否合群。”

“如果你的同龄人开始攻击你，”玛格伦姆说，“你的自我感觉就会开始变得很不好，心情会受到影响，有可能导致抑郁。”

欺凌造成的其中一些迹象包括：情绪变化、自我隔离、疏远朋友以及缺乏上学的兴趣。

莱蒙斯说她感觉到的是最后一种情况。她的成绩正在逐步下滑。但是，由于社交媒体的存在，逃避也躲不开麻烦。在她没去上学的时候，她的同学会发一些诸如此类的消息：“‘嘿，你们注意到了吗？今天学校的空气好闻多了，因为雷切尔没来。”莱蒙斯这样说道。其中一些推文甚至被转发近五十次，将这股敌意传播给教室以外的更多听众。

“爸爸会很失望”

这种难堪处境使莱蒙斯萌生了自杀的念头。《儿科杂志》的一项研究显示，一般而言，受到同伴欺凌的年轻人自称有自杀念头者的概率比普通人高出一倍多，而自称曾经试图自杀者的概率可能为常人的三倍多。

虽然有自杀的念头，但莱蒙斯说，想到此举将给家人带来的伤害，她还是望而却步。“我知道，如果我要自杀，爸爸会对我非常失望的。我不想让他们有这种感觉。”

要克服欺凌所带来的情感痛苦，青少年必须重新获得自我价值感。玛格伦姆说，遭受欺凌的人需要知道，他们是可以有所作为的。

“就算有人欺负你，这也并不会让你变成另一个人。你的价值并不会因此而有所减损。”

网络欺凌有哪些？

·发送低俗或具有威胁性的短信或邮件

·在社交媒体、聊天室或即时通讯工具发布侮辱性信息

·在网上发布侮辱性视频或图片，或者将它们发送给其他人·用别人的账户在网上肆意妄为

·在社交网站建立针对某人的“仇恨网页”或“仇恨小组”