流行词语两则
2019-09-19陈德彰
陈德彰
● 塑料情
“塑料情”也称“塑料友谊”。此词源于2017年3月关于新加坡组合BY2的采访视频,作为双胞胎姐妹的二人互损互怼,暗流涌动,被网友们吐槽为“虚假的姐妹情谊”“塑料花姐妹情”。塑料花虽然看上去很美,永不凋谢,有的甚至可以乱真,但它毕竟是假的,没有香味,更没有灵魂。“塑料情”在女性当中较为常见,故有“塑料花姐妹情”“塑料姐妹”“塑料闺蜜”等说法。看起来亲密无间的两个人,可能很多时候心口不一,嘴上说的和心里想的不一样。有时候是为了面子,有时候是为了利益,只能表面相安无事,其实感情早已变味,说翻脸就翻脸。俗话说“三个女人一台戏”,一些女生之间勾心斗角,维持虚与委蛇的面子社交。
有时,“塑料情”也用于男性之间。这样的“塑料情”朋友,表面上说可以为你两肋插刀,但遇到矛盾时可能会倒插你两刀。这种情谊看起来一片祥和,但与这样的朋友打交道只是在白白消耗你的精力。
“塑料情”有时也是一种调侃,用以自嘲,如:我跟他只是“塑料情”。
Plastic Friendly Sentiments
“Plastic friendly sentiments” is also known as“plastic friendship.” This term originated from two videos of the interview on March, 2017 of the Singapores BY2 band formed by Miko and Yumi. As twin sisters, the two of them mock and lash out at each other. Thus netizens call this kind of friendship “fake affection of sisters” or“plastic affection between sisters.” Plastic flower, though it looks beautiful and never withers away, and sometimes can almost look genuine, is after all artificial, which has no fragrance, let alone soul. “Plastic friendly sentiments”is comparatively common among girls. There are “plastic sisters,” “plastic bosom friends,” etc. They may look very intimate and thick with each other, however, they may talk one way and think another or say what they do not think, sometimes just to save face, and sometimes for their own interest. They superficially keep peace with each other but their real affection may have turned sour. They may fall out or even turn hostile all of a sudden. There is a common saying: “Three females are enough to put up a drama.” Some girls seem to resort to deception and fraud in social interaction. They deal with each other courteously but without sincerity.
“Plastic friendly sentiments” is also used to refer to boys who on the surface assure the other party that they will even risk their own lives for their friends but in fact may give them a stab from behind instead. Such affection may look auspicious, but it is a waste of ones energy dealing with such a friend.
However, “plastic friendly sentiments” is sometimes used as a kind of mockery. For example, someone might say, between him and me exist only “plastic friendly sentiments.”
● 氣球式社交
这种社交关系颇像气球,容易吹起,也容易泄气,戳一下就破,美丽却不可长久。该情形在当下的年轻人社交中颇为常见。现代人的社交关系很简单,你我相识在一场活动,两人都是独自前往,没有伙伴有点儿尴尬,活动上迅速结识了彼此,加为好友并且聊得很投机,告别后便再无联系。越来越多的年轻人开始习惯于“气球式社交”,迅速熟络又迅速冷淡,交流时不用太走心,不需花心思对这段关系进行维护,一不小心关系破裂也没关系,毕竟若太过认真,你就输了。
《社交尴尬症》一书的作者、美国心理学家泰·田代认为:“社交的好处是能提醒我们对归属感的需求,让我们知道自己需要成为群体的一员,并获得群体的支持。”而“气球式社交”似乎并不是一个长久的方式。
北京師范大学心理学院副教授黄四林认为,当前在年轻人尤其是大学生中出现这种现象,跟年轻人交往的目的以及维持这种关系的需要有关。有时虽然建立了联系,但由于没有必要的事情交流,也就没有了维护关系的需求,但这对年轻人的社交意愿影响不大。浅表式的交流已经将现代人的交际内容彻底改变。有网友评论说:“我们很少讨论自己生活以外的话题,不再习惯气氛比较沉重的思想交流。寻找一个志趣相投的谈话对象是如此之难。”或许,与其拥有“气球式”的快速社交关系,不如放慢脚步,长久而美好的联系总是好过“一戳就破”。
Balloon-Like Social Intercourse
Such relationship is like a balloon, easy to blow larger but at the same time easy to bust. It breaks at a prick, and its beauty never lasts long. This is the fashion of present social intercourse of young people. It is easy for people to get to know each in social gatherings. They usually go there by themselves, but it is somewhat awkward without a companion, so they might add each other as good friends on social media and would chat cheerfully. But afterwards they may simply have no contact with each other. More and more young people have got used to “balloonlike social intercourse.” Quick indifference follows quick chumming up. One neednt be mindful in such communication, nor try to think ways to maintain such relations as they do not care when it breaks. You will lose if you are too serious about it.
The author of Awkward, Ty Tashiro, a psychologist in America, holds that “The benefits of social intercourse lie in the fact that it reminds us that we need the sense of belonging and tells us that everyone must be a member of a group from which he can get support.” But bloom-like social intercourse does not seem to be of a lasting mode.
Huang Silin, an associate professor at the Beijing Normal University, thinks that such phenomenon among young people, especially among college students, has much to do with their purpose of intercourse and the need to maintain such relations. Sometimes, though they have set up WeChat contact, they have no need to maintain it as there is nothing that demands intercourse and this does not have much impact on their willingness to keep it. Shallow intercourse has radically changed the content. Some people say, “We seldom discuss topics beyond our daily life and are no longer accustomed to serious conversations in a comparatively more serious atmosphere. It has become so difficult to find someone to talk about aspiration and interest.” So perhaps instead of having “balloon-like” quick social relations, it is better to slow down and try to establish lasting and better relationships.