Learn to smile
2019-09-10郎轩
郎轩
【题目要求】
你们学校将于5月末举办一次英语征文比赛。请你结合所学内容,以“Learn to smile”为题写一篇100词左右的英语作文。
【学生习作】
Learn to smile
Smile is an attitude to life. Life is always kind of unpleasant. Such as failing in an exam, being misunderstood by your friends. These unpleasant things may make you feel sad. Then what will you do?
Why not learn to smile? On one hand, smiling to yourself can bring back your confidence because the greatest enemy is yourself. So we should smile to ourselves. And on the other hand, we should also learn to smile to others because it will help us to get closer to others.
In short, smile is the most widely used body language in our life.
【教師点评】
这是一篇话题作文。小作者首先点明了主题——微笑是一种人生态度。接着通过“考试失利”“被朋友误解导致心情糟糕”的实例,引出自己的建议——学会对自己、对他人微笑。最后用一句话概括出“微笑是一种语言”,以此结束全文。
本文结合生活中面临的挫折,认真分析其原因并提出建议。中心突出,思路清晰,语句通顺,语法正确。
行文中,小作者使用了被动语态,make构成的复合结构等句式,和be full of、bring back、get closer等高级词语,较好地提升了文章的档次。
美中不足的是,作者在写作时没有大胆地使用复合句和较长的句子,语句表达还不够灵活。
总之,这是一篇值得同学们借鉴的优秀之作。
(指导教师:王 普)