尴人有尬福

By+Ty+Tashiro

近幾年来，“尴尬”一词逐渐成为流行热词并衍生出一系列网络词汇，如尬聊、尬舞、尬唱……尴尬之余令人捧腹。《生活大爆炸》中的物理学天才谢耳朵，为人傲娇，行事古怪，常以其超群智商碾压他人，却患有严重的社交障碍——讲话刻薄，听不懂言外之意，也从不考虑别人的感受，人际交往方面令人尴尬。在现实生活中，有社交尴尬症的人也不在少数，然而这一特殊群体虽然另类，却散发着自身独特的光芒。

A few years ago， “awkward” became the term du jour for the socially clumsy.1 When I looked at the number of people who Googled the question “Why am I so awkward？”， I saw a spike2 that remained consistent for five years. The sharp rise in peoples interest in awkwardness may partly reflect the trendiness of the word， but also that more people are feeling socially awkward and wonder why that might be the case.3

Today， its cool to be a nerd4. We cant get enough of awkward physicists on television shows like The Big Bang Theory or awkward millennial sex scenes on Girls.5 When Star Wars： The Force Awakens opened，fans proudly posted their cosplay photos on social media with self-aware hashtags like #awkward and #cantstop#wontstop.6

Although I am encouraged by the growing freedom awkward people have to embrace their unique interests and identity as such， there remain significant challenges.7 While awkward moments are sometimes uproariously funny， chronic awkwardness can threaten ones social inclusion and there are few things more troubling than feeling you are on the out side looking in.8

The roots of the word “awkward” come from the Old Norse9 afgr， which means “facing the wrong way.” It is a useful and relatively benign10 term compared to some of the names kids call each other， but awkward people already know that they see the world differently from most people. What awkward people need is guidance on how to navigate the social world with their unique perspective.

The imagery inspired by afgr gives us a useful clue for developing a more functional definition of awkward people. Afgr suggests that these people are facing the wrong way，but I like to think that awkward people are simply looking elsewhere.

When non-awkward people walk into a room full of people， they see the big social picture. They intuitively understand the emotional tone in the room or how formally they should act. By comparison， awkward people tend to see social situations in a fragmented11 way. Its as if they view the world with a narrow spotlight that means they see some things with intense clarity.12 Its similar to what researchers call “localised processing”， when people narrowly focus on some of the trees rather than the entire forest.endprint

This group tends to create social narratives that feel fragmented and incomplete.13 Researchers have found that awkward people are more likely than non-awkward people to process information in a detail-oriented way， which means that they sometimes have trouble seeing the bigger picture.

But what they do see is brilliantly illuminated and this gives them a deep， nuanced perspective about things that no one else takes the time to notice.14 The parts of the world that they can see are seen with remarkable clarity. There is a tremendous upside that can come from a spotlighted view of the world.15

Awkward people are not better than anyone else， they are simply different. Although they may have abilities or dispositions16 that give them great potential in some areas， awkward individuals are challenged by social situations that come naturally to most people. Awkward people do not deserve special treatment， but they can certainly benefit from some patience， an open-minded approach to their quirks， and support for the things they want to achieve in life.17 Its the same thing that any of us want， awkward or not.

1. du jour： //〈法〉流行的，热门的；clumsy： 笨拙的，不灵巧的。

2. spike： 猛增，急升。

3. 人们对“尴尬”兴趣大增，一方面反映出这个词的流行，另一方面是由于越来越多的人感到社交尴尬，并想弄清个中缘由。

4. nerd：（书）呆子，指很聪明但在社交方面有欠缺的一类人。

5. The Big Bang Theory： 《生活大爆炸》，美国情景喜剧，讲述几个科学天才的故事；Girls：《都市女孩》，美国情景喜剧，主要讲述了一群居住在纽约的二十多岁女孩的故事。

6. Star Wars： The Force Awakens：

《星球大战：原力觉醒》，是《星球大战》系列的第七部电影，由美国华特·迪士尼电影工作室发行的科幻动作片；cosplay： 动漫真人秀，Costume Play的简略写法，一般指利用服装、饰品、道具以及化妆来扮演动漫作品、游戏中的角色；hashtag： 话题标签。

7. 令我备受鼓舞的是，怪咖在接受自己独特的兴趣及身份等方面有了更多的自由，但是他们仍面临着重大挑战。embrace：欣然接受，采纳。

8. 尽管尴尬时刻有时令人捧腹，但是长久如此会影响到一个人的社会融入，没有什么比作为局外人向内张望的感觉更令人不安了。uproariously：// 引人捧腹大笑地；chronic： 长期的。

9. Old Norse： 古诺斯语（14世纪前斯堪的纳维亚人所讲的北日耳曼语）。

10. benign： 善良的，溫和的。

11. fragmented： 四分五裂的，分裂的。

12. 这就好像他们用照射范围狭小的聚光灯看世界，也就意味着他们看到的某些东西会格外清晰。

13. 这个群体倾向于创造出分散而不完整的社会叙述。social narratives： 社会叙述，指通过提供相关线索，解释对他人的感受和想法，说明恰当的社会行为期待，来为学习者描述社会情境。

14. 但是他们所看到的是被格外“照亮”的那部分，这使他们得以从深刻而细微的角度来看待他人未注意到的事物。brilliantly： 非常；illuminated： 被照亮的，发光的；nuanced： 有细微差别的。

15. 这是从聚光灯下看世界所体现出来的非常好的一面。upside： （不利局面中）好的一面，积极面。

16. disposition： 性情，性格。

17. 怪咖不需要特殊对待，但是如果大家能对他们多一些耐心，用更加开明的心态看待他们的怪癖，并支持他们所追求之事，他们定会从中受益。quirk： 怪癖。endprint