Ｅｎｇｌｉｓｈ Ｊｏｋｅｓ

崔增印

A man walks into a shop and sees a lovely little dog. He asks the shopkeeper,“Does your dog bite?”

The shopkeeper says,“No, my dog does not bite.”

The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him.

“Ouch!” He says,“I thought you said your dog does not bite!”

The shopkeeper replies,“That is not my dog!”

There were three restaurants on the same block. One day one of them put up a sign which said“The Best Restaurant in the City.”

The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign which said“The Best Restaurant in the World.”

On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a small sign which said“The Best Restaurant on this Block.”

A woman got on a bus, holding a baby. The bus driver said,“Thats the ugliest baby Ive ever seen.” In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.“The bus driver insulted me,”she fumed. The man sympathized and said,“Why, hes a public servant and shouldnt say things to insult passengers.” “Youre right,” she said.“I think Ill go back up there and give him a piece of my mind.”

“Thats a good idea,” the man said.“Here, let me hold your monkey.”